Always By Your Side
by Goten0040
Summary: Rating may change.HieixBotan fic! Another one! Botan is attacked by a demon that broke into the Reikai, and with all the others on Rekai Tantei duty, Hiei is the only one to be her bodyguard. What happens when Botan begins to fall for her sweet savior?
1. No One There

Always By Your Side

(This story is disclaimed.)

((Summary: HieixBotan fic! Another one! Botan is attacked by a demon that broke into the Reikai, and with all the others on Rekai Tantei duty, Hiei is the only one to be her bodyguard. What happens when Botan begins to fall for her sweet savior?))

Chapter One: No One There

(Botan's POV)

I lay in the dark, staring at the ceiling, an odd look on my face. It seemed as if sleep just refused to claim me, due to a suspicious paranoia lurking in my soul. I sat up, feeling a cold breeze emitting from my window as I did so. Perhaps it was that that was placing the sharp fear in my mind. I just kept feeling as if I was being watched, stalked by an unknown person- or demon for that matter. I let out a sigh, getting up and closing my window.

Creeeeaaaak.

I looked around. I was defiantely apprehensive tonight. It was just that I was getting a bad vibe from the entire surroundings. That lingering feeling of someone watching me still remained. I took a step away from my window. No sound. Carefully, quietly, slowly, I moved backwards, all the way to my bed where I proceeded to lay down once again. I glanced at the clock on my dresser. Two forty-one and counting. Yup, tomorrow was going to be a long day. A long day indeed.

BEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE-

My hand slammed down on my alarm clock, feeling exhaustion washing over me. It was five a.m., and I had to get ready for school. I dressed slowly, barely picking up my pace as I moved out the door towards Saryaski Junior High School. It came to mind that I could just skip school. I wasn't there most of the time anyway, but Koenma insisted that I stay human for the time I was here and that I follow Yusuke and his friends around to make sure they stayed out of trouble. Some job. I tried to amuse myself by swinging my dark bag back and forth, watching it go, but feeling as if it didn't matter. I swayed a bit and shook my head, moving toward the gates of the dreaded place of education, or 'halls of doom' as Kuwabara so vividly put it.

"Well," I muttered to myself, hoping to get a bit encouraged. "Here goes..."

(Hiei's POV)

"Hmm," I thought, watching over the city. "Everything seems too quiet. I don't like it. There's something in the air... I just can't figure out what."

I removed the scarf from my jagan, scanning the area for anything suspicious. Nothing. I shrugged and jumped back down into my tree- at least, it was my tree at the moment. I began to watch people walk by in the park. They were so happy, laughing and carrying on. It got on my nerves. Happy people always got on my nerves. What did they have to be so happy about anyway? According to my logic, happiness wasn't needed because all it would do was upset you when cold, hard reality hit you in the face. Still, it seemed as if something bad was going to happen, a strange uneasiness migrating over me. Either way, it didn't matter to me- at least I told myself that- so I leaned back and decided to take a small nap.

(Botan's POV)

Yawn. Class was boring, as usual. Normally, I would be so perky and happy just to be there, but not today. I was exhausted, and still slightly spooked from the night before. I probably wouldn't get much sleep tonight either. My compact began to beep. I sighed, opening it.

"Yes?" I asked, trying to sound as animated as usual.

"Botan? Could you come up to the Reikai real quick? I have a few things to be transported."

"Sure, no problem, Koenma-sama!" I said, smiling fakely.

(Koenma's POV)

"Ah, Botan, there you are!" I said, looking up from my thousands of papers. "I need you to send a mission to Yusuke."

"Just Yusuke?" she asked.

"Well, Kurama, Kuwabara, and maybe Hiei might come along too."

"Sir, I had to BRIBE Hiei the last few times." Botan sounded unconvinced that Hiei would actually come along again.

To be honest, I didn't want him to come. Any more bribes, and he would be free to roam everywhere. I could let that happen. I sighed.

"Fine. Alert Yusuke, Kurama, and Kuwabara. That's it."

"Yes, Koenma-sama." She bowed.

God, she looked tired, but that was her fault. I couldn't let her take off work just because we were friends. She was my best ferry girl, for crying out loud! I shook my head and went back to stamping those awful papers.

(Botan's POV)

"WHAT? Another one?! Aww.... no fa-ha-hair!" Yusuke whined.

"Yusuke, this is our job, we have to do this," Kurama insisted.

"Yeah, c'mon Urameshi! Let's beat these punks!" Kuwabara exclaimed, in his normal, obnoxious voice.

"Botan, you look tired. We'll go on the mission by ourselves. You should rest." Kurama smiled at me.

"Thanks, but-"

"Yeah, go ahead, Botan, we can handle this on our own," Kuwabara said, trying to sound like some hero.

"Not as long as you're with us," Yusuke retorted.

"SHUT UP URAMESHI!"

"Only tellin' the truth," Yusuke said in a sing-song voice.

Kurama waved me off then tended to Yusuke and Kuwabara's arugment, trying desperately to shut them up. They were too nice. But I was glad they were. I began to climb my apartment steps, shoving the key into the lock, and entering my living room where I proceeded to collapse on my couch to watch daytime talkshows and such. My phone rang. I reached over and grasped the receiver, holding it to my ear.

"Hello?"

Nothing.

Breathing.

"H-hello?" I repeated.

Click.

"EEEEEK! A STALKER!"

I slammed the phone back upon the receiver, feeling my heart hammering through my ribs. It seemed as if my mind could not accept that it might have just been a phone problem or a wrong number- that seemed to obvious at the moment. Perhaps it was because of the still growing uneasiness that seemed to rip through her at every waking moment. That anxiety in which you could see something out of the corner of your eye, turn, and see nothing there. That morbid feeling that you would get, just knowing someone was watching you, but having no proof. I shook my head, something I did more often than usual, when something raced past my window.

I gasped and raced to my window, throwing it open in my fear, my eyes dashing around the area, trying to make out anything that might be threatening. My pulse was growing all the more wild in the silence. I didn't like the fact that I might possibly be a target of something. But why would I be the target when Yusuke was the leader? I wasn't strong enough to be threatenting. Sure, I could swing an oar or a baseball bat pretty hard, but other than that, I really shouldn't have had anything to worry about.

But I did.

(A/N: Yay! I have a feeling this will be my best H/B fic yet. It's coming out really great so far. Hope you guys like! By the way, "Teach Me," my site, will be on hiatus until I can fix up the layout and stuff. Still, I want submissions. I also want to say that if you are submitting me fanart or fanfics, please, PLEASE send a URL, because I don't want to kill my compy with an unknown virus.

Let's all give a round of applause to Jasmin, too! She's helped me soooo much, I want to mention her. She rocks! Lol. The next chapter will be up soon.... I hope... evil school. ;) )


	2. The Attack

Chapter Two: The Attack

(Botan's POV)

Yusuke, Kurama, and Kuwabara hadn't returned yet, however, I had returned to my duties as a ferry girl. My worry had ceased, or at least died down, due to my large workload. It was strange. People were dying left and right lately, all in the same city. It rose confusion in the ferry girls and chaos in Koenma's office. Ogres were running left and right, carrying large stacks of papers for the young God to stamp. I was becoming a bit flustered myself with all these attacks. It made me wonder: Who was doing this? Why? Who were they after? Again, why? I was hoping I wouldn't have to find out first hand, as it seemed that I always did. I sighed, grabbing my oar for yet another pickup of a dead soul.

(Hiei's POV)

"This is ridiculous," I muttered on my breath, "I'm on a f-cking wild goose chase..."

I had been noticing all these killings lately, and I realized that I was beginning to become the main suspect. I didn't like that. I didn't like that at all. Being falsely accused was not one of my preferences unless it got me what I wanted. So, I had been tracing the path of these killings, hoping to find a pattern. Nothing. That's why I was so angry. I ripped my katana from it's sheath and took out my anger on a nearby tree, leaving slash marks in it's large trunk. It didn't help much, being that my temper had risen quite a bit. Another thing that I didn't like? Being fooled. That really steamed me.

I returned my katana to it's scabbard on my back and shoved my hands in my jean pockets. This wasn't easy, even with my jagan. I was all by myself on this one, which made me glad, except for the fact that I was getting nowhere. Oh well, I was getting nowhere by MYSELF, and that was much better than getting nowhere with the oaf, kitsune, and Yusuke. I moved along the sidewalk, trying to think of a possible way this new demon could escape the power of my jagan. It didn't make sense. He couldn't have put a block on my jagan. Was he after me? If he wasn't, who was he after? It had to be me, however, because the rest of the Reikai Tantei were gone on a mission, that I had happily stayed out of. Perhaps I shouldn't have. Judging by the fact that I couldn't lock onto him, he was powerful. Then I smirked. That was no problem for me.

(Botan's POV)

I sighed, wiping sweat from my forehead as I neared the raging river. I had finally finished taking all the souls back. I soaked my hands in the water, splashing it onto my face, feeling the cool relief of a job well done. Then it hit me again. That wave of dread spread over my body like a diesease. I turned, looking behind me, trying to see if anyone was behind me. Nothing. What was worrying me so much?! I turned back to the river, trying my best to stay focused. I gasped suddenly when someone appeared in the reflection... besides me.

(Hiei's POV)

HA! I caught him. That idiot. Why did he think he could raise his power level without me detecting it? I could sense it. He was on the attack again. He was near by. I raced to the spot, the world seeming to flash by. I skidded on the grass until I came to a hault at the river. Why would he attack here? Then I saw it. The cloaked demon was shoving a woman's head under water.

I felt a strange familarity to the woman's clothing before realizing who it was. Botan. She was always getting in trouble, having to have people bail her out. Then I recognized something. All of the killer's victims had been in the same vecinity, heck, the same neighborhood as Botan. Also, at the crime scene, I had seen the word "REVENGE" painted in big, bloody letters. This guy was after Botan, not me. I quickly unsheathed my blade, throwing it with all of my strength toward the demon. It slashed through the cloak, showing that there was no one inside.

"Hm..." I thought, "He's fast. Very fast..."

The woman in which I guessed correctly as Botan arose from the water, her breathing hard. I approached her, but made no attempt to say anything. She looked up at me, lavender eyes filled with fear, then relief. She smiled at me. I rolled my eyes.

"Can you not go ten minutes without getting yourself in danger?"

"Oh..." she lowered her eyes. "I'm sorry... I was just... so scared..."

"Tch. Don't get mushy. I didn't come here to save you."

"Then... why?..."

"I have my reasons," I concluded, "and believe me, I couldn't care less if you lived or died. Hn."

(Botan's POV)

Was he serious? How could anyone be that cold-hearted? Why did he never want friends? I grimaced. Suddenly, I saw black.

I awoke, looking up at Hiei, who merely glared at me. I only passed out for a few minutes, supposedly. Hiei turned around, beginning to walk away.

"W-wait..." I said, finding my voice weak. "P-please... take me to Koenma-sama."

"Like I said, you're powerless. You depend on everybody else to help you. Get off the ground, weakling." He spat onto the grass.

Again, how could anyone be that cold-hearted? I tried my best to sit up, stand, anything, but I found that I was shivering so much that I could barely move. I fell onto my side. I felt as if I was going to be ill. Hiei stopped walking, turning around. His crimson eyes studied me for a moment. We stared at each other for a matter of moments. Was he going to just walk away? I found that my muscle spasms were growing in severity, being that I was also freezing by now, due to the wind that was bringing in the winter. He shoved his hands in his pockets, seeming to ponder a decision. He looked at me, and then the ground, and them me again. Then, he sighed and walked back over to me.

"You are weak. Don't forget that. I will not help you again."

With that, he lifted me up and threw me over his shoulder, making his way through a portal to Reikai. I didn't say anything, because I was sure that he didn't care if I was thankful or not, even if I was. Perhaps Hiei had a concience after all, or maybe it was because he thought I was pitiful. Either way, he was helping me and he had to admit that to himself, which was probably damaging a chunk of his pride right now.

Minutes later, we arrived in Reikai. He began to move down the path toward Koenma's castle. I felt fatigue fall upon me. My mind began to haze, my muscles beginning to give way into sleep. My head began to bob slightly. My shivers intensified once more. Hiei stopped walking again.

"Honestly, I didn't think anyone could act like you. I thought you had at least some strength.... To be honest, I expected you to thwack that guy with your oar."

"I...I guess... I'm just... tired..."

"Tired. Heh, that's just like you humans. Exhaustion after such a simple attack. How DO you manage to keep up with us, Botan?" I could almost feel him smirk.

"I... try," I said, too drained to yell back.

He started to move along the path again. I felt bad, not only sick and haggard, but terrible, knowing that I wasn't strong, that I couldn't fight back, that Hiei was right. I felt tears rolling silently down my cheeks. I heard a small conversation between Hiei and the guards, mostly small threats to let him in or that he would kill them. Then I heard the large creak of the doors, finding myself in slumber, barely even realizing that I had been asleep for a small while after our small conversation.

(Hiei's POV)

"She's asleep," I thought, walking aimlessly down the hallways of Koenma's bastion. "It's strange. Normally, she would be stronger than this, even for her. Seems she barely even struggled. And I can't help wondering if these murders are connected to Botan in some way. There could be a reason..."

I turned a hallway, finding the ferry girl's rooms. I glanced around, finding a door labled 'BOTAN' near the end of the hall. I opened it and cringed. It was... pink... I shuddered at the thought. I never thought I could find anyone so different from me before her. I tossed her down on the bed. She awoke instantly, ready to protest.

(Botan's POV)

"Hiei, what the-"

He grabbed me by the arms, shoving me against the wall, staring deep into my eyes. His jagan glowed, his eyes blanking out slightly. He was reading my mind! How dare he! I struggled, but he held me tightly, seeing into my soul, my own private thoughts, racing through my memories, taking in all the details of my head. I finally managed to push him off of me, feeling weary from the entire episode.

"WHAT THE HELL DO YOU THINK YOU'RE DOING?!" I screamed.

Hiei glowered at me, as if it were MY fault!

"I was trying to figure out who attacked you."

"Couldn't you have told me first?!"

"You were asleep," Hiei said simply.

I could hear the hint of mockery in his voice. I chucked a pillow at him, in which he dodged easily.

"All these murders are connected to you," he said, a seriousness taking over. "I believe you are the target."

He headed out of the room. Just before he left, he turned around, giving me a look of warning. "Do not let your guard down, but I suggest you lie low."

And with that, he was gone.

(A/N: Hiei is in character! YAAAAY! I'm so proud of myself! Anyway, "Teach Me," my shrine to Hiei and Botan is back up. Now, it is a domain, special thanks to my new webmistress (being that there are two now), 

Hope you guys like it! I know I do.)


	3. Assignment

Chapter Three: Assignment

(Koenma's POV)

"WHAT?!" I yelled as George cowered slightly. "WHY WASN'T I TOLD OF THIS EARLIER?!"

"No one really knew until Botan informed us of her attack," George said.

"Bring Hiei to me at once!" I screamed.

(Hiei's POV)

I walked slowly into Koenma's office, irritated that I was being called out of my sleep. It WAS late, but I supposed that it didn't matter to Koenma that people were actually asleep in Ningenkai. I yawned and glared up at Koenma.

"What," I demanded.

"Hiei, why didn't you tell me about Botan's attack?! Why didn't you tell me that she MIGHT be in more danger?!"

"Because, it's none of your business," I answered flatly.

"NONE of my BUSINESS?! HIEI, SHE'S MY BEST FERRY GIRL!"

"Oh, I'm sorry," I said in a mocking voice, "I forgot, you're supposed to know EVERYTHING about EVERYBODY! Well, exuse me..."

"Hiei, you don't understand the seriousness of the situation. Botan is staying in Ningenkai! She could be attacked at any moment!"

"Can't she stay in her room here?"

"Hiei, she doesn't like it here, and I don't want her to be unhappy..."

"Cut the bullshit, Koenma. I know that's not really why you don't want her here. Is it because you refused her, and now you think she's pissed at you or something? Even if she didn't like it here, she would probably cope with it if she was under attack. I, myself, would rather be unhappy than dead. I have been many a time."

"HIEI! She's not as strong as you-"

"Tch, I know THAT. Trust me, I know. She's a complete weakling, always depending on others to do her bidding. Hn."

"Hiei, Botan is a HUMAN. You have to realize that she doesn't have the special abilities that you do. And, since you didn't alert me of this whole attack, I'm assigning you to be her bodyguard."

"WHAT?!"

"You are dismissed."

"Bastard," I muttered, trudging out of the room, George at my heels, trying to tell me what I was going to do. "I'm NOT doing this."

"You have no choice, Hiei!" Koenma bellowed from over my shoulder. "You'll be placed in Hell if you do not do your job!"

I decided to do it, but I wasn't sure which would be Hell, the place? Or being with Botan for a long time. All I knew was, I was going to destroy this guy and get out as soon as possible.

(Botan's POV)

"WHAT?! YOU'RE KIDDING!" I screamed.

"Botan, he's the only one of the Reikai Tantei that can help you right now. Would you rather die?"

"Hiei WILL kill me, Koenma-sama! He will!"

"No, he won't. We've gotten his word and his signature on this contract," he thrusted the paper into my face.

"When has Hiei listened to you?" I was unconvinced.

"He saved you once, I'm sure he'll save you again."

"But Koenma-sa-"

"Trust me one this, Botan. Besides, you might change him for the better."

"Psh, yeah, suuuuuuureeee...."

(Hiei's POV)

I dropped my duffel bag on the floor of Botan's guestroom. It wasn't bad- thank God that it wasn't pink. Besides, it was about time I got a bed to sleep in. Of course, I was in a strangely optimistic mood as well. I unzipped my bag and began to throw stuff into the dresser drawers and closet, then made my way out of the room. I walked into the kitchen and made eye contact with the blue-haired woman. It seemed neither of us enjoyed the situation. Why couldn't Kurama had been the one who stayed?! He was so much more like her than I was, but I got along with Kurama... So why did I loathe her so much?!

"Look," I said. "I don't like this either. If you weren't so weak, we'd both be happy, but you're a wimp, so deal with it."

"Quit calling me weak!"

"Don't be offended by the truth, Botan. Now... I'm going to take a nap. Don't wake me unless it's important. Hn..."

I lay on my bed, slowly falling into slumber, but I couldn't seem to go to sleep completely. My jagan was bothering me. I knew that it's power was increasing, but I still had a small worry that it might not be of use to me for a while. Still, being that I was still tired from the night before, I rested, knowing I needed it.

My jagan sent a jolt through my body. I could hear it coming down, faster, faster... My eyes shot open, and I rolled off the bed before the dagger hit my chest. The cloaked man vanished in front of my eyes. Before my jagan could pick up on his prescence, he had come behind me, wrapped an arm around my neck, and stabbed me in the shoulder blade. I let out a yell of pain, jabbing him in the stomach with my elbow.

"You really are fast," I said, my cocky side taking over, "It seems I underestimated you."

The cloaked figure remained silent and disapeered again. I decided not to take any chances and ran out of the room. I did have a job to do, and this guy was after Botan. I felt warm liquid trailing down my arm and chest, but paid no mind to it, figuring it wasn't serious. I found Botan in the living room, on the floor, trembling. I looked up, and, as expected, there was the cloaked figure. I pulled her out of the way of the sharp object just before it cut across her skull.

"You okay?" I asked, not sounding sympathetic, but urgent.

"Uh... uh-huh..." she nodded, slightly freaked. "You?"

"Hn."

"Oh, my God! You're bleeding!"

"Get over it."

"Doesn't it-"

"GET BACK!"

The cloaked figure disapeered. I grabbed Botan and pulled her off the floor, seeing three blue hairs hit the floor. She was shaking, God, she was shaking. I realized that I was gripping her wrist tightly, because she struggled to loosen it slightly. I glared at her.

"Don't move."

"But-"

"Do not move."

"Okay," she murmured, recoginizing the seriousness in my voice.

(Botan's POV)

Hiei's blood was running onto my hand. That couldn't be good. It was worrying me, but not much. This was Hiei, after all. He could handle it. The cloaked figure jumped at us. Hiei's jagan glowed green, then purple, then blasted him against the wall.

"WOAH! HOW'D YOU DO THAT?!"

"Uh..." Hiei seemed to be wondering how he did it as well. "Hn."

"Nice job..." the cloaked man said. "I didn't expect that."

This was the first time I'd heard his voice. It was almost frightening. I clutched Hiei's hand. He glanced at me, obviously not happy with the gesture.

"Well," he said, turning back to the cloaked man. "I think that it's time you tell me why you're here."

"I came for her," he pointed at me with his bony fingers.

"I know that, asshole! Now, tell me why you're here!" Hiei was losing patience.

"You'll find out soon enough. Now, I suggest you find some medicine for that cut of yours." With that, he vanished.

"What does he-" Hiei froze, paling.

His hand let go of my wrist, and fell to his knees. His hand creeped up to his shoulder, swiping some of the blood from his shoulder.

"Poison..."

"POISON?!" I was surprised.

"Yup. This guy's crafty. I haven't fought someone like him before. Enng..." he winced, his voice growing weaker.

"Hang on, I'll call Koenma-"

"Don't."

"What?"

"I said, don't."

"But-"

"I'll be fine."

"But-"

"Look, I don't like people to know of my injuries, ESPECIALLY people who I don't trust." He turned, glowering at me. "And I don't trust Koenma. I never have. I hate him. Just get me a tourniquet."

"A what?"

"A tourniquet. A bandage?" he was obviously irritated.

"Oh... got it. Hang on."

It was certainly quite an experience, but Hiei acted as if it was no big deal, even if I was following large blood droplets on my carpet. I would have to clean that up later. I grabbed my first aid kit and headed back to the kitchen. I gasped when I got there. Hiei had cut his shoulder even MORE, letting blood drain into my stainless steel sink!

"What the hell are you doing?"

"Emptying the poison before I go numb," Hiei rolled his eyes- as if I KNEW how to take care of poison the hard way!- and continued with emptying the blood from his body.

"Well..." I said, restraining myself from screaming curse words at him, "here." I handed him the bandages.

"Hn."

Figures. Men...

(Chapter Three Ended. Hope you guys liked it. I'm sorry if it's not my best. I'm not doing my best right now. I'm exhausted, stressed to the max, and just slightly uninspired lately. I have to say though, during trans algebra- when I'm supposed to do my work ;) - I've been thinking of the romantic scenes later on in the story. So, sorry if it's not my best work. I hope the next chapter will be better.

Oh, and by the way, my website is now: 

Have fun!)


	4. A New Scar

Chapter Four: A New Scar

(Hiei's POV)

I turned off the water of the shower as I stepped out. It was early morning, about five a.m., but I usually got up this early so I was fine with it. I ran my fingers through my hair, feeling water droplets escape the ravaged mess. I grabbed the towel that I had placed on the counter, wiping away water from my skin. I just couldn't seem to concentrate on anything. The only thing my mind could particularly think about was my growing curiosity of the man that wanted revenge on Botan. Who was he? Why did he want revenge? What did Botan do to have him WANT revenge? A long beep sounding from Botan's room told me that she was awake. It was the weekend. Why was she getting up so early. I wrapped a towel around my waist, shrugging off that question, and headed toward my room to get some clothes.

(Botan's POV)

I rubbed one of my eyes as I made my way down the hallway. I wasn't tired long, however, because Hiei caught me off guard, walking past me in a mere towel. I blushed and turned.

"Hey! Wear some clothes!" I scolded.

He stopped walking.

"You're lucky I'm wearing anything at all." That was obviously a joke.

I was about to retort when I noticed something. A large scar was slashed across Hiei's back, and I knew that that had not been there the last time I had seen him shirtless. I gasped, due to the size of the scar.

"What?" Hiei looked at me as if I were insane.

"What... happened to your back?" I asked uncertainly.

"Hn." Hiei walked back into his room.

I sighed. It wasn't going to be easy living with Hiei, being that he was so secretive. I hated it when people didn't want to talk about anything. Still, though he was reticent, he was also mysterious, almost amazingly. Mysterious men always seemed to give me a chill. It was exotic, and it made you wonder what he was like... there. I blushed at the idea of such a thing and gave myself a mental kick. I shook my head and headed toward the bathroom to take my own shower.

(Hiei's POV)

She asked me about the scar. I had to admit, I had been taken aback from the remark. It was something I didn't wish to speak of, probably something I never wanted to bring back up. I slid on a pair of ripped blue jeans and a gray t-shirt with the word ARMY written across it in black letters that I had borrowed from Yusuke. He hadn't been in the army, of course, he had just bought the shirt when he was bored. My thoughts drifted back to the scar that lay on my back. I sighed, trying to forget it.

I walked out of my room to find Botan fixing breakfast. It was pretty generous of her to make breakfast every morning, especially on a Saturday when she could be sleeping in. I almost felt guilty. Almost. I walked into the kitchen, watching her make the pancakes and eggs. They smelled and looked very appetizing. It was a good thing she could cook, because I couldn't. I could barely use a microwave. That was a secret kept between Kurama and myself however. She looked over at me and smiled. Why did she feel she had to smile at everyone? She turned away quickly though.

"Look, I... uh... I'm sorry about asking about... your scar... and all. I was just curious..."

"It's nothing," I returned, quite hostile that she brought it up again.

"You're okay with that?"

"Ningens are naturally curious. I can't blame them for asking questions," I said in a slightly meaner way than I meant.

Botan remained silent. I thought she'd finally given in and decided to be quiet around me. Kurama had when I lived with him for a while. She handed me two plates and pointed to a drawer, which I supposed held silverware. I shrugged, deciding that I should at least set the table. Botan was being pretty inviting, letting me stay, even if it was for her own good. I lay the plates and silverware down, just as Kurama had taught me a while back. Botan smiled at me again and sat down, filling the plates with the delicious breakfast food. Breakfast finished in silence, and to be honest, I felt bad about it!

(Botan's POV)

I had finally decided to not talk to Hiei. I knew he didn't like it, so I didn't talk to him. I saw a small tinge of guilt in his eyes which made me smile, but I was sure he didn't realize it. Hiei just didn't seem to feel emotions at all, and I was dying to know why. What was his backstory? What happened to him to make him so different from Yukina, who was such a wonderful person? Was he able to change after such a long time? How long had he been like that anyway? These questions were unanswerable as of then.

(Hiei's POV)

I had my hands on the mirror. The moon had reached one a.m., showing through my window, giving the room an eerie glow. I was staring into my own eyes, searching for something, anything, that might give me an answer to my problems. I could the pain of a scar upon my back. I had to snap out of it. My eyes had shown sorrow. It seemed my eyes wanted to tell all lately. I felt a chill crawl up my spine. My emotions were to be kept inside... always. I could not let them get the best of me. They couldn't be unleashed upon the world- they could hurt me... and they could hurt others. I closed my eyes, feeling the wind blow in from my window. I was exhausted, but everytime I slept, the scar came back to mind. Not to mention, I was slightly worried about this guy that was after Botan. Was he really after her? Could he be after me? I seemed more logical, but how would he know... Ugh, I didn't know. My mind couldn't think when it was this tired. I fell back on my bed and collapsed into slumber.

(Botan's POV)

I arose immediately, sweaty, though it was cold in the room. I glanced at the clock. Three-thirty-eight a.m. That dream was horrible. I stood up, feeling a draft coming frm the hallway, an eyebrow raised. I followed the cold breeze into Hiei's room, where he lay, sleeping... hard. I hadn't seen Hiei in such a deep sleep before. Not even when he was unconcious at the tournament! He must have been up late. I closed the window that he had left open. Hiei just lay on the bed, snoring slightly, but not like Kuwabara or anything. I pulled the blanket over him, sighing softly and leaving the room, but not before turning off his alarm clock.

(Hiei's POV)

"Huh?" I sat up quickly, looking around. DAYLIGHT?!

I quickly jumped from my bed, tossing a blanket back. I looked at the clock. One o' clock... P.M.?!?!?!?!?!?! I stomped out of the room, a glare fixed on my face.

"Botan!" I yelled. "Why the hell did you turn off my alarm clock?! I was supposed to be up... EIGHT HOURS AGO! MY DAY'S WASTED!!!"

"I was doing something nice for you!" She returned, angered.

I stopped. Nice? NICE?! I had to get up and train... FOR HER! And this was n-... wait... She had risked her existance to let me SLEEP? Now I felt bad...again. Why was I feeling bad anyway?

"Look," she said, "You obviously went to bed late. I just thought it'd be nice if you slept in..."

"Botan, it's TWO P.M." I said, quite impatiently.

"I know."

"So...?"

"You were sleeping so deeply, I just couldn't wake you!"

"Woah, woah, woah... You were watching me sleep?!"

"EEK! No! Not really... I was just... uhhhhh....."

"Freak."

"I'M NO FREAK!"

"Weak freak."

"Asshole."

"Oooh, touchy."

"Why are you so mean to people? Weren't you ever nice? Even when you were a child? I mean, what did your mother do-"

"SHUT UP!" I screamed.

Botan became quiet. No one spoke of my mother. NO ONE. No one knew her, no one understood her. No one was supposed to. And no one, NO ONE, was to speak of her... EVER.

"...What? What about your mother-"

I slammed Botan against the wall, my katana raised.

"I told you... to shut up... now.... shut... up." I demanded.

Botan paled, a sweat coming upon her face. She was going to say something, but closed her mouth, remaining silent.

"Good," I said, letting her go. "Don't EVER speak of that to me again. Do you understand?!"

"Eh... uh huh..."

"Good."

Wordlessness followed. I walked away, outside, and onto the grass down below the apartment. I could feel this emptyness growing inside of me, just at the mention of her. My dearest mother.... I hadn't spoken, hadn't thought, of her in such a long time. I let out a long sigh, trying to calm myself. I felt like I needed to destroy everything around me. The mention of her name brought the scar, and the scar brought sadness, and the sadness brought fear. I could not show such things, and I didn't wish to threaten her, but I felt I had to get my point across. Yes, I would definately have to take a while to myself to get over this ordeal. Still, I felt I knew that she was meaning it better than I took it. This was going to be difficult...

Very... very... difficult...

(A/N: I liked this chappie! It's pretty good. I'm alot more relaxed this time. Anywho, I think this was very emotional. I do think Botan might start warming up to Hiei... maybe vice versa. I wanna keep the tension as much as possible. SLY 2 CAME OUT! XD)


	5. Unwanted Nightmares

Chapter Five: Unwanted Nightmares

(Botan's POV)

I was running. Running down an endless path that was shadowed by darkness. My heart was racing. All I could hear were voices. I stopped, feeling the world around me turn into a shaded, but familiar scene. The people in the scene were indistinct, but their screams were so familiar to my ears that I didn't know what was happening.

"Damn you!" A man's voice screamed.

"You can't have it!" a woman's voice returned as the shadow-person pulled a lighted orb away from him. "I won't let you! You killed them with this!"

"Give it back, you bitch!"

"NEVER!" the orb fell from the shadow-woman's hands, shattering into thousands of millions of pieces.

"NO!" the shadow-man screamed as a blue mist flew from the orb and absorbed into her skin.

A blade was pulled from the man's sheath. It was stabbed into the woman's heart. The woman fell, letting out a scream of pain.

(Hiei's POV)

I rose up immediately when the scream filled the rooms. Expecting an attack, I rushed to the ferry girl's room, threw open the door and let out a sigh of frustration upon finding the room empty. Still, worry fell upon me when I saw Botan's face. It was so pale... carrying a deep fear that chilled even my bones.

"What the hell?" I said, wondering why she was so frightened.

"I...I..." Botan's breath was short. "I'm... okay..."

Her eyes were turned away, lined with tears that she could not hide. I blinked, confused. Why did she feel she had to act strong around me? I already knew she was weak! Still, it proved I had made quite an impact on her, and I even felt a little guilty, knowing she wasn't used to holding back tears as she was. I let out a sigh and moved over to her.

"What happened?" I asked reluctantly.

"It was... just a dream... that's all...."

"A dream?"

"L-look... it doesn't matter. I'm fine! Really!" Botan was a horrible liar. When she closed her eyes to laugh, the tears ran down her cheeks. She gasped and wiped them away quickly.

"Botan," I said irritably. "If you're not going to tell me what the dream was, I'll got back to bed and leave you in here all alone to cope with it on your own."

"I can't really explain it," she said softly. "It was a memory-like dream. A girl seemed to take this orb or something from this man. They were fighting. She dropped it. The power that it held went into her body and he killed her... I... I felt it. I felt the blade stab through my heart..."

"I see..." something than occured to me. "Botan, how did you die?"

"I don't know. Only King Enma knows such a thing."

"I see."

"I'm sorry... I know I'm weak..." Botan wiped away streaming tears from her face.

I couldn't say anything. I wiped a tear from her cheek, making her blush, gave a simple 'hn' upon realizing what I'd done, and left the room in a quick stride.

(Botan's POV)

I pressed a hand to my my cheek, feeling it warm slightly at the thought that Hiei had shown a small bit, no matter how small, of kindess. I smiled after him. Perhaps we were having an effect on each other. I lay back down, closing my eyes. For some reason, after Hiei's interruption, I felt safe. I slept soundly until morning.

(Hiei's POV)

I couldn't get Botan's nightmare out of my head. The way she described it, it seemed as if it had almost happened. The first thought that came to mind was the bloody words spelling 'REVENGE' upon the walls of some that she cared for. Perhaps this was the revenge he was talking about. I couldn't be sure until I figured out how she died. But how would I do it? King Enma wouldn't just give a demon like me information on one of his best workers. But maybe Koenma.... I could try, but I doubted I'd get far. I let out a sigh and lay back on my pillow. I had been thinking about this since she had woken me up earlier. Now, the sun was rising. I decided to get up, perhaps do some training or some studying on the man in the cloak. Now that I had this clue, I might be be able to find something. I set off to the Rekai Library to get some books.

(Botan's POV)

"Hiei?" I peeked out my door. "Are you here?"

Hiei walked in from the front, carrying a few books under his arm. He blew a stray hair out of his eye.

"Hey," he said.

"Um...hi... Did you leave?"

"Yeah."

"Why?"

"I'm going to look up this nightmare of yours."

"What? Why?"

"Because, I think this might be why this guy is after you. If I can find out how you died and who did it, we might be able to defeat him, because I have sources that can tell me his weaknesses."

"Mmhmm, but what makes you think it's real?"

"I'm not sure. The way you described it... I guess it might be real. I would like to do a mind scan on you if you will let me."

"Oh, you're asking now?"

"I don't feel like being yelled at," Hiei glowered at me. "So, will you? I might be able to see deeper into this dream."

"Sure," I said, not wanting to make him mad and have a repeat of a few days ago.

"Okay, then, sit down." He gestured to the couch.

I nodded and sat on the couch. Hiei removed the scarf from his jagan and sat beside me, facing me. His hands moved to my face, his touch making me tingle, much to my shock. He let out a soft hum, his jagan glowing. I felt as if I was wisked away to a land where all was calm. My heart slowed slightly and a strange sleep fell upon my form. Suddenly, everything returned to normal. I looked up, surprsied. His hands moved slowly away from my face. He had a puzzled look on his face.

"Everything is still shadowed. You really don't remember this guy... I am positive that you were killed by him, however. I just wish I could have gotten a visual..."

"Well, you tried," I smiled.

"Tried, and failed," he snapped.

"Oh, don't start that, grumpy!" I laughed, waving my hand.

"Grumpy?" Hiei glowered at me.

"Yeah! You should really cheer up!"

"I block out happiness," Hiei got up to walk away.

"Why? Happiness is great!"

"Happiness isn't always there, stupid."

"Oh, why do have to be so difficult?!"

"I like being difficult," I could almost feel his smirk. "Anyway, I'm going to look through some of these books- hopefully find a lead."

"Can I help?" I asked.

"You...want to help?" Hiei turned to me, surprised.

"Sure, why not?"

"Don't you have other things to do?"

"Not really. I...I'd like to spend some time with you. You know, get to know you better?"

"You won't get to know much, but whatever. C'mon."

The two of us moved to a bedroom where we took seats on the bed and floor and began to flip through books.

"Hmm..." Hiei seemed to be in deep thought as he scanned the pages half-heartedly.

"Something wrong?"

"No," he answered as if he expected me to say that. He probably figured I would.

"I'm sorry," I said, sighing.

He looked up, this time surprised. "For what, onna?"

"I know you don't like it here... and for what I said the other day..."

"Forget it," Hiei said, laying back on the bed, holding the book in front of his face. "It's fine. Just don't do it again."

Perhaps living with him would be better than I thought. I smiled.


	6. Mental Problems

Chapter Six: Mental Problems

(A/N: Sorry for the long update folks. I got a new computer and never got around to transferring this fic to my hard drive. Also, I've been addicted to a few other fics lately. Sorry. Well, here's the next chapter anyway. XD)

(Botan's POV)

"Good Morning, Hiei-san!" I greeted as he entered the kitchen.

He nodded a greeting and sat at the table, seemingly happier than he had been lately, and that was saying something. I set breakfast down on the table and the two of us began eating in silence- something I had grown used to.

"So," Hiei, shockingly started the conversation. "Any nightmares I need to know about?"

Of course. Hiei would never make actual conversation. I shook my head.

"Good."

"Anyway, I was wondering if you wanted to go out today? Do some errands with me?"

"Like what?" Hiei raised an eyebrow.

"Like… get groceries and stuff."

"Do you need my help?"

"Well, I do have to buy extra…"

"Sure, whatever. I've helped Kurama with his groceries before. I wonder if he's back yet, anyway?" He looked out the window.

"Probably. Koenma might have ordered them not to contact us for fear someone might be listening. We can't let out secrets out, ya' know."

Hiei looked at me for a matter of minutes, reading me. I felt nervous under his stare, even if he did it a lot. I waited for him to say something, but he didn't, which took me by surprise. He turned away again.

"Yeah."

"Something wrong?"

"No," he said. "When do you wanna go shopping?"

"Whenever. We can go after breakfast if you want."

"Sure," he said, but I could still tell he was distracted.

I didn't say anything.

(Hiei's POV)

I was glad her nightmares had stopped, but now I had started having strange visions! Was this dream thing contagious? I ran a hand through my hair, remembering the night before:

_"Kill her… Kill her… Kill her…"_

_I didn't know who was saying that, and I didn't understand who they wanted me to kill and why. I looked around, only seeing darkness._

_"Kill who?" I asked the dark, hearing my voice reverberate off invisible walls._

There had been no answer, just an extreme, sharp pain in my head. It awoke me immediately, but I had refused to yell out. I knew that if I did, Botan would worry, and I didn't need that. The pain was still numb in my head now… I stopped, realizing she was staring at me.

"What?" I snapped.

"Nothing… you just look… troubled…"

"I'm fine," I said, taking my empty plate and placing it in the sink, not even remembering when I ate the food on it. "Shall we head out then?"

"I guess," she said, placing her plate in the sink as well. "Just let me get ready. You should take a shower too."

"Why?" I looked at her.

"You're really sweaty." She moved out of the kitchen and towards her bedroom.

"I hadn't realized…" I said softly, knowing she was gone, but feeling like she wasn't.

I wiped the sweat off my brow and decided that a shower might be a good idea. Perhaps it could relieve some stress, I told myself.

(Botan's POV)

Something was definitely wrong with Hiei. In his thoughts, he seemed to just break out in a sweat. It worried me. What could have caused him to fret so much, even if it was in his mind? I pulled my hair down out of its nightly braid, letting it fall down to the middle of my back. I then made my way to my closet to pick out what to wear. Sifting through the clothes, I found a black t-shirt and some loose blue jeans. After I put the outfit on, I stepped over to the mirror.

"Oh, my God," I marveled. "I'm starting to DRESS like him now? Ugh!" But I didn't change my clothes.

(Hiei's POV)

The shower wasn't as relaxing as I had hoped. The small pain was still pounding throughout my head, a constant reminder of that strange dream, and my thoughts were clouded because of it. I dried myself off with my towel and reached for my clothes, consisting of red boxers, black, baggy pants, and a red t-shirt with a rock band's name on it. I grabbed some spike bracelets before retreating to my room to grab my black "skater shoes," as Kurama put it. I tied a red scarf around my head.

I had to admit, I didn't look too bad. I looked cleaner, for one- like I had actually put some effort into looking good- even if I hadn't. I stretched and walked out to meet Botan at the front door. She looked good. Black complemented her well- of course, in my opinion, black complemented everyone. I nodded another greeting to her, something I had come accustomed to doing, and we headed out the door. I shoved my hands in my pockets and walked behind her as we made our way down the sidewalk. That dream was still bothering me, but not as much as the pain in my head- which I mentally cursed about every few minutes or so. Botan seemed happy, something she hadn't been in awhile. It was much better than watching her cry- though I would never speak of that. She had begun to hum some tune that I found quite lovely in its simplicity.

"What are you humming?" I asked with interest- When did I ever show interest in something so trivial?

"Oh, just a song… I don't really remember what it is. All I know is that someone sang it to me when I was living my first life."

"Really…" I said, intrigued. "Who do you think it was?"

"Probably my mom or my dad or something. Heck, it could have been my boyfriend. I don't know…" Botan's eyes held confusion and ignorance of her past. "I wish I did."

"You don't remember your past?"

"No, I don't." She bowed her head slightly in thought.

"Well, if it's any consolation, I wish I DIDN'T remember my past."

"Why's that?" She looked at me in wonderment.

The memories of my childhood stung in my mind, not really helping the helpless migraine I was dealing with. I bit my lip, trying to concentrate more on that pain than the one in my head and shook my head.

"Forget I said anything."

Botan stared sympathetically at me for a few moments, making me feel a bit uncomfortable. I hated pity. I didn't deserve pity, nor did I want it. I glowered at her and she turned away, walking and humming again, but a bit more somber than before.

"There ya' go, Hiei. Can't STAND to see her happy, can you?" I shoved this thought out of my mind the moment it entered and concentrated more on getting rid of this headache that plagued me.

(Botan's POV)

I had never known what had happened to Hiei to make him so cold. Now, I was positive it was something awful, and it made me feel horrible just thinking about what could have possibly caused him to turn so dark and cruel. Still, he had been warming up since he had started living with me anyway, and that made me feel proud of myself- It was a hard job to do, making Hiei actually START a conversation. I glanced at him through the corner of my eye. His face was expressionless, absolutely unreadable, as it usually was, but there was something about his eyes, those blood droplets, that gave a deep strain to my heart. I started walking faster. We didn't speak until we got to the grocery store.

"Here it is. We won't have to get much. You don't eat much more than I do. Why is that anyway?" I asked.

"I've gone for days without food. I'll survive," was his answer as he began looking at the many shelves of food.

I started putting some vegetables and fruit in the basket on my arm when a thought occurred to me. I decided not to mention it right away, perhaps wait until later.

"Let's not get too many refrigerated items," I said. "It's a long walk home."

"I could have run them there before you finished your sentence," Hiei said, plainly. "I just feel like walking today…"

"Are you okay?" I asked, seeing that he was slightly paler than usual.

"I'm fine, I assure you," Hiei said, making eye contact with me. He then turned and began picking out some food that he liked. "Besides… I want some sweet snow…"

"Sweet snow?" I raised an eyebrow.

"Strawberry sweet snow. Kurama always has it at his house."

"Strawberry sweet snow…" I watched Hiei enter the freezer section and open one of the glass doors. He withdrew a carton with a picture of pink, fluffy ice cream on the front. "OH! Is that what you were talking about?"

"Duh, ferry onna. Don't be stupid." He tossed the carton and it landed neatly in the basket. "Now, what else do we need?"

"Well, I've got almost everything on my list. All I need is some bread and some pasta."

"Hn?" He seemed to be wondering what I wanted with that.

"I thought I'd make some Italian food this week. Have you ever had Italian?"

"Tch, I'm lucky if I get HUMAN food," Hiei smirked. I laughed.

"Well, you're in for a treat then…"

After paying for the groceries, we were making our way back to the apartment when the question popped into my head again. I bit my lip and closed my eyes for a moment, fearing Hiei's reaction to it.

"Um… Hiei?"

"What?" he stopped and started at me.

"Did you ever have a girlfriend?" I asked with as nonchalantly as possible.

A smile twitched at the corners of his mouth and his eyes seemed to have compassion for mere seconds. He turned his back to me.

"No."

"Never?" I provoked.

"Never." I saw his hands squeeze the grocery bag straps.

"Why not?"

"Reasons I really don't feel like explaining, Botan," Hiei sighed, sounding exhausted.

He began to climb the steps to my apartment and I followed apprehensively. I had never heard Hiei sound so tired before. It was like he regretted his answer- and he might have, if Hiei ever regretted anything anyway. He helped me put the dishes away, seemingly distracted- as he had been this morning. I watched him close the last cabinet and close his eyes, concentrating on something.

"Hey," I said.

"What is it?"

"Do you wanna… go for a walk?"

"We just walked to the store-"

"No, like… just a walk. To clear our minds?"

He turned and read my face, then nodded. His silence, though normal, was almost alarming. It was not the 'I don't like talking' silence that he usually carried, but one with sorrow, and perhaps quite a bit of pain. I felt bad for asking about his past.

As we walked, the sun was rising to high noon, but it was slightly chilly outside, so the heat was welcome. I turned to Hiei and smiled. He didn't return it. It didn't seem he even noticed I was there- He was so fully, and utterly preoccupied.

"Something wrong?" I asked in a bubbly tone, one I hadn't realized I used so often.

"Not really," Hiei said.

More silence. I hated it. I thought I had grown used to Hiei's quiet nature- and I had- but now, I was interested in asking him things. It was like there were a million doors to his soul and each one held a story. And each one held a story in his eyes. I longed to know those stories, no matter how hurtful or awful they may have been. I truly wanted to know about this fire demon. We had begun to approach a park when clouds began to hover over the sun. The park was empty because many of the children were inside, for it looked like rain may fall. A chilly wind had begun to blow, and I shivered slightly. It was a good thing I had grabbed my jacket, I told myself and removed it from my waist. The chill didn't seem to even phase Hiei. I watched him as he walked, that horrible pain in his eyes that not even someone like he could ever hide. Why hadn't I ever noticed it? It was so obvious. Of course, I thought, Hiei had never been to obvious in my sites either.

"Let's sit down," I suggested, gesturing to a bench to our right.

"Okay," he said.

"You don't talk much, do you?" I asked, taking a seat.

"Not usually. I don't have much to say…"

"Well, you sure talked a lot when we first met."

"I was stupid then, stupid and inexperienced. I wasn't talking- I was gloating. I don't even know why I did either…"

"You know… it is kinda weird to think back and imagine that guy as you, not just because of the gloating, but because of how cruel you were to everyone…"

"Yes, I suppose I have grown softer," Hiei didn't seem too happy on admitting that fact.

"Could you tell me something?"

"I suppose. It depends on what you want to know."

"You're a fire demon, but Yukina's an ice demon. How can you two be brother and sister?"

I saw Hiei flinch at the question. I had never seen him wince like that.

"Well, that was a blow below the belt," Hiei half-smirked.

"Sorry," I said, "But really."

"Again, that's part of something I don't feel like explaining…" That pain seemed to dominate his features now and I looked down at my lap.

Hiei winced again and brought his fingertips to the bridge of his nose, pinching it.

"What's the matter?" I asked quickly, hoping it wasn't something I had said.

"Nothing… nothing… just a headache."

"Why didn't you say anything? I would have gotten you some medicine."

"Well, I kinda hoped it would go away, but…" His voice had begun to sound strained.

"Are you okay?" I asked, walking to the front of him and getting on my knees to look up at his face.

"It's probably just my jagan acting up," Hiei insisted as lifted my hands to his face.

"Your jagan acts up?" I was unconvinced.

"Well, yeah, it's not supposed to be there. Surgical jagans usually act up every once in a while."

"Has it ever acted up before?" I asked, feeling like a doctor.

"Well…" Hiei didn't want to tell me.

"Hiei…" I said warningly.

"Don't threaten me. It hasn't."

I slipped my hand underneath his scarf, it resting on his forehead.

"You feel like you might have a bit of fever."

"Remove your hands from my face, _please_." Irritability beleaguered his voice.

I did as he said for fear he might actually hurt me, which he might have, due to the sound of his voice. He saw my face and turned away.

"Forget it." He said. "Quit worrying about me…"

"Worrying… Hiei, I-"

Hiei's eyes widened suddenly, the pupil dilating. I gasped.

"What is it?!"

Hiei the squinted his eyes and covered his ears tightly, his knees drawing up to where he lay his forehead. I could hear his breathing become harsh.

"What's the matter?!" I quickly asked crawling to his side and laying a hand on his shoulder. "Hiei… ANSWER ME!"

(Hiei's POV)

"Hiei… ANSWER ME!" Botan's voice echoed in my head, but it seemed millions of miles away. All I could hear was the voice that I had heard the night before.

_"Kill her…KILL HER…**KILL HER!!!!**"_

"N-no… Why are you telling me this…"

_"KILL THE FERRY GIRL! KILL BOTAN!"_

"NO!" I yelled, not sure if I was consciously doing so or not.

_"**KILL HER!!!!**"_

"I… do not… take… DEMANDS!"

(Botan's POV)

"N-no… why are you telling me this…" Hiei was muttering.

"Hiei! What's WRONG?!"

"NO!" he yelled out.

"HIEI!"

"I… do not… take… DEMANDS!" he yelled out, his jagan glowing a bright green through the red scarf. I gasped and fell backwards onto the ground.

Silence…

Hiei looked down at me for a moment, then collapsed. I gasped again and crawled toward him.

"Hiei? HIEI!" I feared I might run out of oxygen because of all my shock.

He moaned loudly and opened his eyes in mere slits. He seemed curious as to where he was, remembered, then shook his head.

"Someone was trying to gain control over my mind… but I do not… give in… so easily…"

"Here, let me help you up…"

"Thank you," he said.

I blushed slightly at his kindness and lifted him to his feet. He grasped my arm, making me flush more, and we walked back to the apartment.

(A/N: It may have been a while to wait, but I made sure it was a long chapter, dammit! XDDDD Anyway, I hope you enjoyed this chapter as much as I enjoyed writing it. Now… **I** have a headache, so I'm gonna take some medicine. Later Days!)


	7. Situations

Chapter Seven: Situations

(Botan's POV)

Hiei hadn't spoken much since the incident at the park, which wasn't surprising. Someone had invaded his personal space, which he cherished, and he was not happy. When Hiei was extremely upset (or violated such as this matter called for) he became darkly quiet- a frightening silence that chilled the room over, no matter how many people were laughing. Still, that silence softened when he was around me now, much like it did around Yukina. It made me feel a bit proud of myself. It was strange to see Hiei react in that same way to someone besides his sister. That silence, however, was always sad, especially around Yukina. I longed to know why he always had this sad whim about him when he was around her, and now, me.

"Hiei?" I asked, entering his room. It was about midnight, but I knew he was awake.

"What are you doing up?" he asked, looking up from the book he was reading.

"I couldn't sleep," I gave a simple answer.

"Nightmares?" he asked, sitting up a bit.

"No… I was just thinking about your past…"

"My past?" Hiei placed the book to the table on his left. "Why are you wondering about MY past? Shouldn't you be trying to figure out your own past?"

"Well, it's just… you're always so sad when you're thinking about it… why?"

"Because…it was a sad time…" That look returned to his eyes- that look I hated.

"I hate that look," I stated cautiously. "Please don't look like that…"

Hiei stared up at me. "Look like what?"

"Your eyes… they're horrible…"

Hiei bowed his head. "I don't know what you're talking about."

"Yes, you do!"

"SHUT UP!" Hiei's head shot up, his crimson eyes shining like blood.

I took a step back. Hiei's face was completely white- only his eyes standing out. He punched to the left and broke the lamp on the table that held his book. I could see him trembling against his will.

"My past is none of your business," his voice came harshly.

"H-Hiei… You… You're scaring me…" I stammered.

Hiei stopped and stared at me, then looked down at his cut hand, littered with shattered glass. His eyes widened at the sight as if he had never seen his own blood. He looked back at me, that sad look so strong that it made me feel as if I was dying. I slid down the wall, my vision blurring with tears.

"STOP LOOKING AT ME!" I screamed, having the salty liquid flow down my cheeks.

Hiei shook his head and stared down at his hands.

"I'm sorry."

"What?" I looked up, surprised.

"I said… I'm sorry…. I don't like talking about my past. I lost it…"

"I suppose it's my fault…" I sighed, moving over toward him and placing my fingers on the wounds inflicted upon his hand. "Here, let me help you."

My hands sent a bright flash of golden lighting and his hand was healed. He didn't look up at me. I realized that he was still shaking.

"What's wrong?" I asked quietly.

"Nothing." He returned quickly. "You should go… get some sleep…"

I nodded, not wanting to argue with him anymore. I stood and left him.

(Hiei's POV)

I closed my eyes and opened them again, desperately trying to fight the pressure behind them. I stared at the mirror on my wall, seeing my pale face, my lost eyes, my utter, insignificant self. I stumbled over to the mirror and pulled off my shirt. I slowly turned and looked at the large scar upon my back.

_"THE CURSE HAS RETURNED TO SEEK VENGENCE! KILL HIM! KILL HIM!" One of the elders yelled over the other koorimes._

_"Damn," I curse, jumping out of the way of their arrows and ice powers._

_The moment I landed, I froze. Right in front of me was a grave… Hina Jaganshi. I felt everything around me crumble. I had been so sure she was still alive. I stared at it in awe, as if not really seeing it there. I reached out and place two fingers on the icy tombstone, feeling her name engraved in it. A sword suddenly came down upon my back. I yelled out and sent flames at my attacker. I gasped, seeing it was another of the elders of the village. I quickly staggered to my feet and broke into a run._

_"Hiei…Hiei…"_

_I kept seeing my mother and Ruri, crying for my loss. Crying for me. I had no control over my powers then. I felt all the snow and ice around me melt as I screamed to the sky… over the other koorimes' screams. _

_I saw Yukina's face, shocked and tearful. The letter she had dropped to the ground. She was shivering._

_"My… my village is gone…Someone burned it…and all its occupants."_

_I had felt my knees buckle at those words. I had done it… I had made her cry, something I never wanted to do, yet I had so easily. I quickly walked out of the room without a word. I heard Yukina sobbing into Kuwabara's shirt and Yusuke, Kurama, Genkai, and Keiko trying to calm her. I saw snow beginning to fall and felt a pain I had never felt before. I jumped away, out of sight before anyone even thought of looking for me._

I felt my head pounding, the pressure behind my eyes growing harder and harder. I fell backwards against my bed. I pressed a hand to my face and closed my eyes, finally feeling that pressure relieved as the first tears in a long time slipped down my cheeks.

"Damn it… damn it… DAMN IT!"

I fell to my side, my eyes shut tight. I was so horrible. I was a traitor. I made her cry. I truly WAS a curse. A curse upon the world… and everyone thought so…. No longer able to stop myself, I started choking on sobs that had lingered in my throat since childhood.

"It's all my fault… I'm sorry… I'm sorry…"

(Botan's POV)

I didn't sleep well that night. I kept thinking about that pain I felt when I saw Hiei. I had never cared for Hiei much until he had started living with me. It was strange how a person could grow on you when they were around so often. All the other times I had been around, Hiei had only been a condescending, silent, arrogant jerk. But now… even though he was still silent and such, he had this air of… of… sentimentality, something that he hadn't noticed. It seemed that, if something did happen, Hiei would protect me for more than it being his job. I closed my eyes and curled up under my comforter, desperately trying to think of something to put me to sleep.

"I'm sure the Reikai Tantei have returned," I thought softly. "Perhaps they haven't given thought to where I've been. Or Hiei for that matter… or maybe Hiei was right about Koenma telling them not to disturb us in case of that cloaked man. Why was he after me anyway?"

Those thoughts weren't exactly comforting. The memory of that cloaked man and that water… and that I had almost died…. I bit my lip, shuddering and pulling the covers tighter around me. Exhaustion plagued me, but my heart was beating fast, telling me to stay awake. I forcefully closed my eyes tight, trying to sleep. Soon enough, I fell into an uncomfortable slumber.

(Hiei's POV)

I woke up on my floor. A creak had come to my attention, waking me from the sleep I hadn't even realized I was in. As I sat there in the dark, I felt the silence. The silence was too uneasy to be good. I stood slowly and made my way into the hallway. Something wasn't right. A horrible feeling was growing increasingly worse in my stomach with each step I took. I knew that if I used my jagan, whatever that was here might sense me, and if it was nothing, it could awake Botan, and I didn't want to make her angry.

"Wait… Botan!" I thought suddenly, then broke into a run towards her room.

(Botan's POV)

I could feel hands upon me, cold hands and even colder night air. I struggled out of my sleep and came face to face with deep, dark, never-ending black eyes, masked by… a cloak. I gasped, but his hand slammed down over my mouth.

"Silence, woman," he whispered harshly, "or you will not live much longer."

I bit his hand. He pulled it back quickly and glowered at me.

"Isn't that what you want?" I asked, feeling the Hiei-attitude I had acquired over his presence. "To kill me?"

"Oh, no," I could feel the man's smirk. "I'm going to make you WISH you were dead."

I tried to hit him, then realized that my ankles and wrists were bound to the bed. I tried to scream, but he slammed his mouth over my jaw, his tongue flying down my throat. I choked and wondered if vomiting in his throat would make him go away. Doubtful. I tried desperately to free my hands, but they were bound tightly- the only thing that I was doing was making the ropes cut into my wrists. The man's hand crept up to my shirt and ripped it away.

"Hiei…" I thought. "Hiei…. If only I could reach him…"

I began to tremble as the man began to force my pajama pants down to my knees, then fondle my breasts, all the while keeping my mouth shut and taking my oxygen. I felt tears in my desperate attempts to scream. Suddenly, I heard the doorknob shaking, then a loud pounding on my door.

"Hiei… he felt it…" I said, feeling my body going numb as the cloaked man began to slide his hand down beneath my underwear. I frantically tried to move, but found that my whole body was about to give out.

"Botan! Open the door!" Hiei's voice came from the other side. "Or I'll break it down!"

"Yes! Break it down, Hiei!" I thought, choking on sobs. "Save me!"

(Hiei's POV)

I could hear various creaks of Botan's bed, and I could feel a dreadful presence from that room. I pounded on the door once more, listened, then gave up.

"She'll hate me for the door," I thought, "But I have to make sure she's okay."

I quickly lifted my foot and slammed it into the door, having it fall to the floor. I ripped my katana from its sheath and froze in the doorway, seeing a man glowering at me from Botan's bed. He pulled away from her and Botan began screaming.

"HELP ME! PLEASE! HIEI! HELP ME!!!"

"You," I said gruffly, then attacked the man.

He quickly disappeared and reappeared on the balcony. I threw my katana towards him, but he vanished as abruptly as he had moved before. His presence was gone at least, which meant he had actually left the vicinity. I quickly moved to Botan and began untying her hands and feet blindly. They dropped immediately as if they were strained by large weights. Still, she lifted herself up, shaking crazily. I reached for a lamp.

"No," she whispered. "Leave it off."

Then I realized why. Botan's pants and underwear were around her ankles and her shirt remained on the floor to the left. Her hair was down and in great disarray. She had obviously tried her best to fend off the man that had attacked her. I reached for her shirt and handed it to her. She held it in her pale fingers, staring at it in the moonlight that came before sunrise. She then stared at me, trying my best not to look at her. I understood that she was a woman, violated no less, and I refused to stare at a woman in such hysteria. It was wrong. Part of my code, no less.

"H-Hiei…" she stifled, then threw herself at me, sobbing into my shirt.

Shock washed over me as did an ocean of emotions I had never felt before. I hated that man, hated him for what he had tried to do, hated him for being born. She clutched my shirt tightly and bawled, crying out my name for comfort. My arms slipped around her, feeling the red-hot skin on her back, and held her for minutes that seemed like hours. I had never seen someone so frightened, but I had to ask her about what had happened.

"Did he hurt you?" I asked quickly.

"N-no… not physically… you stopped him from that," she said shakily.

"Good," I said, "But it won't stop me from killing him."

"I… I was… so scared!" Botan screamed. "I was so afraid he would take advantage of me! I want my first time to be for love…"

Her arms went around my neck and she sobbed into my shoulder. Even though it was a strange situation, I didn't feel awkward about it at all. I just let her cry, something I normally wouldn't let someone do, and vowed to myself how horrible the man's death would be.

"Thank you for saving me…" she murmured after a few minutes had gone by. She was still trembling crazily.

"Thank God I sensed him," I returned. "Now, calm down."

"I-I j-just can't stop shaking…"

My hands began to move slowly up and down her back. She finally began to relax and breathe normally. I still kept moving my hands along her spine, even when her breathing had reached normal. For some reason, I feared she might become hysterical again, and I didn't want that. Was it that I had actually begun to care for her that much? I knew she had changed me quite a bit. I didn't snap at her quite so often, and she never reprimanded me when I did so. She just let me do it, as if she knew I didn't mean it. Perhaps I didn't, but how did she know that? I could feel her shivering against the night air. I slowly pulled the sheet around us both, not being able to wrap it only around her. I could still feel her hot breath on my neck and closed my eyes, slowly soaking up the tingling feeling it sent through my veins.

"Feeling better?" I asked softly.

"Y-yes," she pulled back, her exposed body back in my vision. She didn't seem to care, though. She trusted me that much? "I do… thank you… so much…"

I felt a smile tug at my lips. A smile. The sheet was still around us and would probably be difficult to get out of. When she had jumped to me, the clothing around her ankles had hit the floor, sliding off of her legs. Her face was tearstained. I lifted my hand and subconsciously began to wipe away the salty liquid upon her cheeks. She flushed slightly at my touch, sending sparks through my nerve-endings.

"It's no problem," I said, removing my hand. "It's…"

"Your job," she finished sadly.

"What I wanted to do," I said, not really realizing what I was saying.

"Really?" Her voice was so endeavored that it was nearly inaudible.

"Yes."

She tried to pull away from me more to retrieve her clothes, realizing finally that she had been this way in front of me. Still, she didn't seem to care if I saw her or not. Perhaps the dark made her feel more comfortable. It always had for me. Even as she tried, the sheet got in the way, leaving us both to strive to get out, though I didn't believe either of us wanted to, deep down. She finally slipped out of the sheet, and I climbed out of the tangled mess. Botan began to pull her clothes back on weakly. I dropped down on the floor beside her, seeing her wince as she pulled her clothes on.

"It's kinda hard. I feel really… tired," Botan admitted, leaning against the side of her bed for support.

"Here," I said, helping her.

With my help, she was fully dressed again. She blinked slowly then stared at me.

"I'm scared," she said. "There's no way I can stop him if he comes back. I can barely move…"

As she said this, I had begun checking her wrists and ankles for bleeding. Her left wrist had a small cut, covered in crimson fluid. I ran my thumb across it, smearing the red stain.

"It's fine. I'll make sure he won't hurt you. Can you walk?"

"My legs are a bit shaky," Botan said, blushing, "But I can tr-"

I lifted her up, her legs dangling over my left forearm, my right arm held across her back. Her face went cherry red, visible even in the moonlight, but she wrapped her arms around my neck to steady herself. I felt a small bit of blood hit my neck, again sending shivers up my spine. I slowly carried her out of the room, over the broken down door, and into the living room, where I sat her on the couch. The living room was much darker than Botan's bedroom since Botan's curtains over the balcony door were a silky, clear white, while the curtains in the living room were a dark velvet-like blue.

"Your wrist is bleeding. Where's the bandages and such?"

"There's a first aid kit in the bathroom," Botan said softly.

I quickly moved to the back, grabbed the first aid kit, and returned before anything could begin to worry her.

"Hold out your wrist," I stated.

She did as I told her. My fingers steadied it and I brought my face down to it. Slowly, I began to lap up her blood. She gasped and pulled her hand back.

"What the hell are you doing?!"

"I'm stopping the bleeding. Now, give me your wrist."

She sighed and returned it to its spot.

"Just trust me, okay?" I looked at her, not angry, not even stern, just questioning.

She was surprised at me, but nodded. I returned to licking the small wound, tasting the coppery blood. I felt her tense up as my tongue touched her skin. I looked up at her and she quickly shook her head. I finally stopped the bleeding and covered it with the bandage from the first aid kit.

"That wasn't so bad, was it?" I asked, slightly teasingly.

"I suppose not," she said, too exhausted to say much more.

I clambered up beside her on the couch. "You okay?"

"I was about to ask you the same question," Botan smiled tiredly.

I was taken aback by the comment. "What are you talking about?"

"You've never been this nice before…" she sighed. "It's… well… refreshing."

"I do not treat a woman after such a situation badly," I said.

"I see… is that the only reason?"

"I'm afraid I don't understand," I said, making eye contact with her.

"Nevermind," she sighed, slowly falling sideways.

I caught her. "What's wrong?"

"I… don't feel well. Kinda… sleepy…"

I fell backwards onto the couch cushions, Botan on top of me, my arms still wrapped around her. Botan had fallen into deep sleep and lay on my chest, snoozing. She was so worn out that she had fallen asleep right there. She was so warm. I actually felt nice with her there with me. She obviously felt good too. I closed my own eyes, dozing off, my arms still around her. She would be okay. As long as I would be there. And I would be.

(A/N: Woo! I LOVED writing this chapter. It was romantic, but not too romantic. Perfect! I think I basically kept them in character too, and that was hard to do. Well, I'll have the next chapter up soon. I'm contemplating a lemon in this fic. I'm not sure. If there's a point where it'll fit, I might. I dunno. Well, please review! Mwah!)


	8. Closer

Chapter Eight: Closer

(Botan's POV)

I twitched and stirred, feeling the need to wake up. I knew I was laying on something hard, but it was comfortable whatever it was. I couldn't quite remember what happened before I fell asleep, just the traumatic situation I had almost had. I slowly opened my eyes, feeling fingers jolt slightly on my back. I gasped and looked up to see Hiei, sound asleep… underneath me. I must have fallen on him! But it seemed he hadn't cared, since he let me stay there instead of shoving me off. I lifted myself up, his hands slipping from my waist. He stirred, then opened his eyes halfway.

"Wh-what?" he murmured, sitting up. "Oh, Botan…"

I yawned. "What time is it?"

He glanced over at the clock, then smirked. "Two-thirty."

"In the afternoon?!"

"Calm down, Botan. We both went through a lot last night. We can sleep in if we want to."

I blushed slightly. The way he said it would make someone turn around and stare at us, if anyone was there of course. He looked at me.

"Are you alright?"

As he said this, the events of the night before slowly began to wash over me, making my eyes glaze over in tears. I quickly nodded and turned away.

"I'm fine… physically, except for a few bruises…"

"Your pride's the problem, isn't it?" Hiei asked, seemingly understanding.

"Y-yeah…" I said, feeling the tears spilling out of my eyes.

Hiei stared at me in a strange way- I could see him from the corner of my eye.

(Hiei's POV)

As each tear fell from her eyes, I felt this strange feeling within me. I wanted to hold her in my arms again and tell her that she would be fine, but this time, I was afraid. Me, Hiei Jaganshi, afraid of a ferry girl? I supposed anything could be possible. She wiped away the drops and turned to me.

"Hiei? Why are you staring at me like that?"

"Huh?" I snapped out of my daze and shook my head.

She slowly fell back onto my shoulder, closing her eyes. "I couldn't have made it through this whole thing without you. You've been so kind…"

"F-Forget it," I stammered, feeling my arm slip around her waist.

"I want to repay you…"

"I'm supposed to protect you, Botan. You don't have to repay me for what I'm supposed to do."

"You called me Botan," she giggled, making goosebumps rise on my skin and heat rise to my face.

"Y-yeah… I did."

"Hiei…"

"Yes?"

"What do you think of me? Am I annoying?" She began playing with her fingers.

"Not at all," I heard myself say, not truly aware of anything anymore. "You're fine."

"I'm glad. I was hoping this wasn't all a job to you…"

The truth was, it wasn't anymore. I had figured that out last night. As I had slept, I had dreamt of what life would be like once this mad man was defeated and we went back to normal, her working, me brooding after the Reikai Tantei, and, really, I couldn't imagine it. I couldn't see myself not living with her, not being with her. She really did brighten my life. The best part was that she did it without even trying. She was incredible, and I admired that. She tried her best with me, always trying to make me happy, even though she didn't have to. She could have just left me in my bedroom and lived out her life while I kept my eye out for anyone, but she didn't. She pushed and pushed and tried to get to know me. Now, it was beginning to rub off. My mind slowly trailed off to the night before. Her body was so lovely. Every curve was perfect, brought out in the moonlight that darkened her powder blue hair. Her skin was so hot to the touch, such a perfect, milky color, so utterly satisfying.

"Hiei," I thought quickly. "What's coming over you?"

But that thought was a million miles away at the moment. I had never been so close to someone, in any state, not even Yukina. Yukina had fallen head over heels for Kuwabara, pushing me more and more out of the picture, and I certainly didn't feel that way for Kurama. Gross. The moment I agreed to watch over her, I never expected this. I never expected to have this feeling, to hold her like this. But here I was, doing the exact thing I never expected to do, and she liked it. I had lost all control of myself. I was no longer Hiei anymore, but someone else. I didn't know who I was anymore, but this person was definitely someone I didn't presume would be inside my cold exterior.

"What about me?" I heard my voice again. "Do you think I'm annoying?"

"No," she said. "I don't. I think you're very… sweet…"

Sweet? Now, that was a word I never thought would be used to describe me. But I loved the sound of it. Someone calling me sweet. It was so strange that it was perfect. Perhaps that was how I felt about these feelings within me as well.

"When did you change, Hiei?" Botan whispered.

"Change?" my voice said.

"Yes," she pulled away, snapping me out of yet another trance. "Change."

"I… I don't know," I said, blinking.

She stood and headed toward the kitchen. I watched her walk, predicting how every curve moved in its utter perfection. She stopped.

"Are you hungry?"

"Not really," I said, not wishing to start normal conversation again. "Surprisingly."

"Me neither," she said, making a smirk tug at my lips for some reason.

"You should take a shower," I said, "You look a little beat up."

"Yeah, thanks," Botan said, beaming at me, making my heart beat faster. She walked out of the room, leaving me alone in my thoughts.

(Botan's POV)

"Well, that was certainly strange," I thought, grabbing another outfit from my bedroom. "What's gotten into you, Botan? Laying all over Hiei like that… what's the deal?"

I walked into the bathroom and set the things I needed down, then closed the door and locked it. As I waited for the hot water to warm, I stared in the mirror, dropping my outfit to the floor. I had bruises on my breasts and thighs. I gasped suddenly when a strange thought of Hiei running fingers over each of those bruises entered my mind. My face flushed bright red and I shook my head.

"WHAT THE?!" I thought, shocked at myself.

Steam began to pour from the tub and I quickly turned on the showerhead. I stepped in and let the warm water pour over me. I let out a long sigh of relief at the heat.

_It's not as warm as Hiei…_

I gasped again. What was the deal with all these thoughts?! Hiei was just a friend- heck, who knew if he was even that. Still, I supposed a bit of sexual tension could happen. After all, we were roommates, basically. But that was a bit much! I wondered if Hiei had thought thoughts of me like that! I quickly grabbed the shampoo and began scrubbing my head to get the idea out of my head.

"Botan, ol' girl, you've finally gone insane," I muttered.

(Hiei's POV)

I slid on a black shirt, buttoning it up to my chest, then grabbed my blue jeans that were ripped at the knees and at one thigh. The bottoms were frayed from wear. I liked them. They were comfortable. I then ran a hand through my hair, and stretched. I was feeling a bit back to my old self, not so wishy-washy. I tied a black scarf around my forehead, covering my jagan, then made my way out of my bedroom and into the hall. I could still hear the shower going, meaning Botan was still in there. I turned and stepped into her room, staring about the place. The balcony door was still open, the curtains flailing in the wind. I walked out on it and felt the breeze upon my face. It was quite bright outside, strangely suiting my mood. I leaned upon the banister and stared out over the city.

"Hiei? Is that you?" I heard to my right.

I jumped and looked down, seeing none other than Kurama standing below me in his school uniform.

"Kurama?" I said, hopping off the balcony to the sidewalk.

"Yes," he said. "What are you doing at Botan's house?"

"Just talk to Koenma about it. He'll explain the whole thing," I sighed. "I don't really feel like it right now."

"You look a bit sleepy."

"I'm quite well rested, actually. I slept in this morning." I purposely failed to mention why.

"Really?" Kurama raised his eyebrows. "That's not like you."

I felt my old personality take over. "Hn."

"That is," Kurama said, smiling.

"How did the mission go?"

"Oh, it went well. We came back a few days ago."

"Good, good…" I said, trailing off.

"Hiei…"

"What?"

"You seem different for some reason? Is anything bothering you?"

"No," I fibbed. "I'm fine."

"Okay… well, I'm going to be late if I don't get going. Perhaps I'll see you after school?"

"Perhaps, Kurama," I said.

Kurama took off down the sidewalk, staring at his watch.

"Well, that was awkward," I thought, jumping back up onto the balcony. "Even for me…"

(Botan's POV)

I squeezed my hair out in the towel as I stepped out onto the hallway carpet in my blue jeans and pink tank top. My mind was still wandering over what had happened between Hiei and myself. I stopped in my doorway- my broken door was propped up to the left. Hiei was standing on my balcony, staring out over the horizon.

"Um-"

He turned quickly.

"Oh, Botan…"

"What are you doing?" I asked.

"I just talked to Kurama," he said. "Didn't say much though. He was on his way back to school from free period."

"Ah," I said. "It's a beautiful day…"

"Yeah…"

"Hiei?"

"What is it?"

"Do you think that man will come after me again?"

"Definitely," Hiei sighed, closing the balcony doors behind him and plopping down on my bed. "It's definitely not over. He wouldn't give up that quickly."

"What if he comes after you?" I asked, jumping down beside him. The sheet that had been wrapped around us the night before lay crumpled up in between us.

"I'll fight him."

"Hiei, this guy's faster than you are?"

"Hn," he smirked. "Only when he runs away."

I giggled slightly and saw Hiei's pupil dilate slightly, then return to normal. He nodded.

"It is true, though," he said. "This guy runs a lot faster than he fights. I don't know how strong he is yet, but he is certainly crafty…"

"You can beat him," I said. "You can beat anyone."

"I'm happy to hear you're confident of my protection," Hiei said.

"I am."

"…"

"Hiei?"

"Yes?"

"What happened last night?"

"What do you mean?"

"What happened between US last night?"

"U-us? What do you mean-again?"

"Yes, us." I said rolling over onto my stomach so I could look at him better. "Something happened last night. You changed… I changed…. Was it because you saw me… um…" I felt embarrassment upon me as my cheeks warmed extremely.

Hiei flushed slightly, his cheeks brightening a bit red. His eyes trailed away. "I didn't look…"

"Oh, c'mon, Hiei! You're a man! Of course you looked, and I don't care. You can't help it." I smiled, giving him a playful punch in the arm.

"Okay, maybe I looked… just to see if you were okay… I'm not a pervert like other men. I don't look at woman for MY pleasure."

"Really? That's so gentlemanlike!"

Hiei raised an eyebrow. "So?"

"There aren't many guys out there like you, you know? I've never met someone like you before…"

"What are you talking about, now?" Hiei sighed, sitting up next to me, wafting his hand over the white, silky canopy to my bed.

"Well," I said. "I've never met a man like you before. I mean, you can be cold and patronizing, but at the same time, you can be gentle and sweet- when you get down to the core. Then, though you look dangerous, you're a gentleman deep down. Why do you hide your inner self, Hiei?"

"Eh?" The question obviously caught him off guard. He turned away. "I don't know…"

"Then why did you open up to me?"

"I don't know."

"What's happened to us?"

"I don't know!" Hiei said loudly.

I stopped questioning. Hiei obviously felt guilty about opening up to me after such short time. He hadn't even spoken in such a way to Yukina or Kurama.

"I'm sorry," I said. "But I promise I won't talk of the things you've said to me."

"You're too easy to talk to," Hiei sighed. "How the hell do you do it?"

I smiled softly. "I really don't know." I winced at the bruises on my skin. He looked back at me.

"What's wrong?"

"Just a few bruises getting at me," I said, lying back.

"He did hurt you."

"Not as much as he could have, Hiei," I said softly.

Hiei crawled over me, staring me down. I blushed under his vision. He pulled up my arms and stared at them.

"Where are they?"

I blushed wildly. "Places I wouldn't like to mention, thank you very much."

"I thought you didn't mind me seeing you naked," Hiei teased, his scarlet eyes flashing.

I swore my face was on fire as he said that. It made my body tingle and my mind wander. He smirked and got off the bed, making his way toward the door.

"Uh-uh… Hey! Where are you going?"

"What? You want me to stay?" He returned.

I blushed furiously. "I was just curious."

"I'm gonna take a shower; clear my mind." Hiei sounded quite serene as he said this, making his way out the door.

"What a good idea," I thought, laying back on the bed, sighing.

(A/N: Ooh, the sexual tension is rising! XDDD Still contemplating the lemon in this fic. I dunno. Maybe I will, maybe I won't. I had to put Kurama in here for a minute, just to give all you Kurama fans relief that he's alive and well. XDDD Anyway, I hope you liked this chapter. Romance is definitely coming soon. Mwah!)


	9. Nature of a Woman

Chapter Nine: Nature of a Woman

(Hiei's POV)

The water felt good, but not near enough to distract me from the thoughts of the night before. I felt so drained and confused. My mind wasn't working properly anymore. I sighed heavily, feeling the steam lift up and soak into my skin. I lifted my hand and stared at it deeply, remembering those awful cuts and those beautiful pale hands laying upon it, healing it with grace. I felt my heart stop for a moment, remembering every single detail of those hands and her eyes, those bright eyes filled with worry… worry for me…

"What's happening to you, Hiei?" I asked for what seemed the millionth time that day.

(Botan's POV)

I could hear the shower running and, the curious side getting the better of me, I set off to Hiei's room to dig up some clues on his past. If he wasn't going to tell me, I decided, I would just find out for myself. I stepped in, seeing it basically the same as the night before, glass still shattered on the comforter, the bed made.

"Did he not sleep in his bed last night?" I wondered, stepping over toward it to pick up the remains of the lamp.

Suddenly, my foot fell upon something round and slick, knocking me over, senseless. After my surprise subsided, I looked at my feet to see what I had slipped on. What lay on the carpet were quite a few, ebony, shining pearls. I scooped them up in my hand and stared at them in wonderment.

"There's no way… These couldn't possibly be…"

But I knew they were, even if I didn't believe it. These were Hiruseki stones, but not from Yukina, being that they were black. These were Hiei's tear gems. Hiei had been crying! No wonder he was acting so different! When I had asked him about his past, it must have brought back awful memories…

"Oh," I said. "I feel so guilty…" I leaned against the bed, staring into the mirror across from me. "What does he see when he looks in the mirror?"

Slowly, I got to my feet and stumbled out of the room, carrying the Hiruseki in my pocket. My stomach was growling, but I didn't care. I didn't want to eat. I felt sick at my stomach at the thought that Hiei had been crying and I hadn't even heard him. Then, he came and saved me without so much as a second thought and held me close while I cried. Why didn't he trust me to hold him when he cried? I placed a hand to my heart, my eyes welling up in tears.

"Don't you dare start crying, Botan," I thought. "Don't you dare…"

"Botan?"

I bit my lip at the sound of Hiei's voice behind me.

"Y-yes?"

"What are you doing?"

"Nothing, Hiei."

"What's the matter?" I could hear him approach.

"NOTHING, Hiei!"

His hand came to rest on my shoulder, and the tears came flowing.

"Damn," I muttered.

"Botan…"

I turned to him and gazed wearily into his eyes. "You… you were crying last night… weren't you?"

Hiei seemed surprised, but let it slide. He shook his head and sighed. "Botan, why did you sneak in my room?"

"H-Hiei… why…"

"WHY did you sneak into my room," his voice came more harshly.

"I-I was cleaning it, and I slipped on this…" I half-lied.

Hiei became silent and sat down next to me on the couch. He shook his head, a small smile growing on his lips.

"You never give up, do you? You're quite persistent…"

"Hiei… I didn't mean to invade your privacy…"

"Can it," Hiei sighed. "I know."

"You okay?" I asked softly.

"I'm fine. What about you?"

"Why do you ask?"

"You slipped didn't you," I heard a small chuckle from Hiei's throat.

"I'm okay," I said, beaming at him.

"Good," he said.

He was taking this much better than I thought he would. The tears still lingered in the bottoms of my eyes. I leaned my head back, staring at the ceiling.

"Hey, Hiei?"

"What is it?"

"Do you know what love is?"

Hiei went mute. I felt that pain in his eyes without even looking.

"N-no… not really…"

I giggled, deciding to lighten his mood- hopefully. "What about lust?"

Hiei nearly choked, then nodded. I tried so hard to hold it back, but I burst into hysterical laughter. Hiei glowered at me and I ceased, refraining myself from anything else to embarrass the fire demon. He hated being embarrassed, obviously. I suppose it made him feel vulnerable. I patted his shoulder.

"Hey, I'm sorry. I didn't mean to-"

"You just surprised me, is all," Hiei smirked. "I didn't think you were THAT kind of girl."

It was my turn to be embarrassed, and fuming mad. I clunked him on the head and he laughed slightly, rubbing his head. I smiled at him brightly for the first time in a while. That pain wasn't nearly as visible as before. I had even forgotten about the hiruseki stones in my pocket.

"You wanna go for a walk?" I suggested suddenly.

"Sure," he shrugged and stood, offering me a hand up. I took it gratefully and the two of us set off toward the outside. "As long as those migraines don't start up again."

Hiei grabbed a couple of jackets by the door before we left, tossing me my blue-jean jacket and slipping on his black trench coat which, even I had to admit, was very cool, suiting his every feature, even his eyes. I giggled and followed him down the stairs of the apartment. I hadn't realized how late in the afternoon it had gotten. It didn't seem as if the day had passed so quickly. Of course, we had awoken late in the day. I watched as the sky began to take on a hue of different reds and oranges and yellows, and breathed a sigh of relief. Such beautiful colors. I stopped upon realization that Hiei was staring at me.

"What?" I asked.

"You… like sunsets, Botan?" Hiei stared off to the horizon, his face void of any emotion.

"Yes, but I love the sunrise…"

"The sunrise is always much more phenomenal than the sunset, Botan," Hiei sighed.

"Almost like the rise of love and the fall of love, huh?" I said.

"I… wouldn't know…"

Guilt suddenly draped my body. "Oh, I-I'm sorry…"

"You apologize a lot, you know that?" Hiei said, slightly snapping, but seemingly half-heartedly.

"I guess… I've got a big mouth…" We continued walking.

"Or maybe you're just scared of what you feel…" Hiei suggested.

_"Hypocrite," yelled the voice in my head._

Hypocrite? Why would Hiei be a hypocrite? Why would what HIEI said be true?! I thrusted my hands into my pockets and slowly moved onward as the oranges and reds began to fade into a deep, never-ending, violet. A chilly wind began to blow and I clutched my jacket tightly to me, but finding no warmth, being that it was thin. Hiei halted at the bridge that went over the river.

"What's wrong?"

"Nothing," Hiei replied, leaning on the railing, "Just thought I'd stop for a moment…"

(Hiei's POV)

I stared at Botan as she took a spot beside me, smiling out over the water.

"It's so pretty…"

"Huh? Yeah…"

I had begun to realize what she reminded me of. Nature. She had different seasons of emotions, different colors of her life, rain and sun, but no matter what, she was beautiful.

_"What the hell?!"_

"Hiei?"

"Yes?" I answered back, still lost in thought.

"Um… nevermind…"

"What?"

"Well… do you think we could walk like this more often? It's pretty calming, ya' know?"

"Nature does that to you," I said, "and I suppose we could."

"Cool. Speaking of cool, it's getting pretty cold out here. We should head back."

"Wait…" I said. "Just a little longer…"

I stared up at the sky as it took on it's blackish-blue depth and began to sparkle with litters of stars. Botan sighed in amazement. She obviously didn't come out this far, where no streetlights reached. The stars just lay upon their ink black blanket, in effervescent glory. How I loved the stars.

_"They're just like her eyes…"_

Why was I thinking these things?! I quickly shook the thought out of my head and turned, headed back toward the main street.

"Okay, we can go now…"

"Oh, I want to stay now!" she exclaimed, still in awe, but obviously shivering.

"Botan, we don't need to be out here in the dark," I said.

"It's just so magical…"

"Botan, if we don't go, that guy may come after you again!"

"Won't you protect me?" she looked at me, making my heart jolt suddenly.

"Not if he kills me first," I said flatly. "Besides, it's supposed to rain tonight. Clouds will cover it anytime now. Let's GO."

"Okay, okay, quit whining," she chuckled hopping after me.

I closed my eyes, walking about three feet in front of her, and smiled. A true smile, one I actually felt. But I couldn't help it. For once in a lifetime, I was happy. Happy where I was… and who I was with…

(A/N: This one goes to you, Sara! She's been begging me to update. So I did. Viola! Hm… I wonder what will happen next chapter?! …Actually, I dunno yet… O.O LOL, had ya'll on the edge of your seats, didn't I? Well, I promise the next chapter will be as good as I can make it. Ciao!)


	10. Anyone Like You

Chapter Ten: Anyone Like You

(Hiei's POV)

I didn't know why I was standing there. I had tried to convince myself that I was watching for the man in the cloak, but I was merely watching her sleep. The moonlight cascaded over her as it had two nights ago, but she was in more peace than before. I leaned against the wall, my arms crossed, watching her chest rise and fall with her small breaths. Her hair spilled over her shoulders and the sheets, every strand perfect. Her eyelashes fluttered slightly in her sweet dreams. Her lips were the perfect shade in the night and visibly soft. I felt my hand rise slightly, wanting to touch those flawless lips, but I stopped myself, still wondering what was coming over me yet again. She stirred slightly and I froze, my heart stopping. She let out a long breath of sleep and I relaxed.

"No… please don't…" she whimpered suddenly.

"I shouldn't," I thought. "But… I have to…"

I slowly removed the scarf over my jagan and concentrated on her dreams, seeing them slowly build up in front of my eyes. The whimpering in my ears was turned to the screaming she was truly doing in her dreams.

She (and now I) was running. Running down an endless path that was shadowed by darkness. My heart was racing. All I could hear were indescribable voices. She stopped as I felt myself do, feeling the world around me turn into a shaded, but familiar scene. The people in the scene were indistinct- I had no idea who they were… but I had a good idea.

"Damn you!" A man's voice screamed.

"You can't have it!" a woman's voice that I recognized returned as the shadow-person pulled a lighted orb away from him. "I won't let you! You killed them with this!"

"Give it back, you bitch!"

"NEVER!" the orb fell from the shadow-woman's hands, shattering into thousands of millions of pieces.

"NO!" the shadow-man screamed as a blue mist flew from the orb and absorbed into her skin.

A blade was pulled from the man's sheath. It was stabbed into the woman's heart. The woman fell, letting out a scream of pain. Suddenly, light began wash over the deceased woman's body and I gasped. I could recognize that powder blue hair anywhere.

"BOTAN!" I yelled out.

Botan shot up, sweat pouring off of her. She turned to me with fear in her eyes.

"I…it was me… wasn't it?" She said, knowing that I had been watching her for some reason.

"I… don't know…" I lied, but I knew it was her.

"Don't lie, Hiei… I saw it… I know you were reading my mind. It was me…"

"Botan," I murmured, hating the look on her face.

"That man killed me…"

"What did you have?" I asked. "That orb…"

"I… I don't remember!" She yelped, placing a hand to her forehead and pressing hard.

"Whatever it was, it went into your skin," I said taking a seat in front of her on her bed.

I grasped her hand and stared at it, rubbing my thumb slightly over the pores. I furrowed my eyebrows in thought.

"It had to be something that guy wanted…"

"I'm sure it was the guy in the cloak. His eyes… they were the same…"

"I see," I said. "Do you think it was some sort of power?"

"Again, I don't remember. I don't remember anything before my death."

Then a thought occurred to me. "Reikai… it has an entire filing system on everyone who's ever lived or died, right?"

Botan looked up to me with wet eyes and nodded. "Yes, but it's super protected. No one can go in there."

"I'll find a way," I said, standing quickly. "Reikai guards 'got nothing on me."

"Hiei, you'll have to go past Koenma himself to get to those files. He has the key, and he trusts NO ONE with it."

"I can get that key, Botan. I will. It's the only way we can get this guy…"

"And save me…"

"Yes, and then…" I stopped, feeling a strange sensation of pain wash over me. "We can… go back… to normal…"

"Yeah…" Botan sounded horribly disappointed, perhaps more than I did. I glanced back at her, then I averted my eyes before she caught me.

Why did this hurt so bad? My mind kept telling me to say something, but I found wordlessness every time I opened my mouth. Botan let out a long breath then stood, approaching me from behind. She stopped right behind me, seemingly in deep thought.

(Botan's POV)

I wanted to say something. God, I wanted to say something, but I couldn't. There was nothing to say that wouldn't make me cry. I hated crying in front of Hiei. I decided to forget my thoughts and move on impulse for the first time in my life. Slowly, I wrapped my arms around Hiei's neck and shoulders and rested my head on his right shoulder.

"Tell me…" I whispered. "How do you feel right now?…"

I felt Hiei tense from my touch. He seemed to be thinking about how to answer me, or perhaps he was arguing with his inner self- something I was sure that he did often.

"Right now?"

"Yes."

"I feel… good, I suppose. I'm not really sure…" his voice was soft and wistful.

My arms tightened, my body closer to his than ever before. "How about now?"

"Answer your own question, Botan," Hiei said gently.

"I feel amazing," I heard my voice say, no longer aware of anything but who I was with. "This is perfect. Right here…"

"No, it's not," he returned, sending pain through my soul, making my arms loosen.

Hiei turned around to stare me in the eyes. His eyes shifted slightly, then he threw his arms around me, pulling me close quickly.

"This is…" he whispered harshly, as if expecting himself to die right there. It was hard for him to show this much emotion.

My hands crept up his back and tightened the embrace that we shared. I bit my lip and began weeping. I wasn't sure why, but I was.

"Yes… this is perfect…"

His arms were so warm, so inviting. I never wanted to leave. I wouldn't have to, but it wouldn't be right if I stayed there. So, ever so slowly, I pulled away, his hands still resting on my waist, mine still on his shoulders. I felt a smile on my lips, though I still felt the salty tears pouring down my face. He didn't say anything. Neither did I. What was there to say? It was as if we had learned everything from each other in that one hug. Hiei seemed almost ashamed that he had shown that much of his true self.

"Not yet…" Hiei said, seemingly losing control of anything he was saying.

I had lost control too. Slowly, ever-so-slowly, we moved closer and closer and closer. His face was inches, centimeters, millimeters from mine. My eyes fluttered closed and then…

BAM!

The balcony doors flew open and Hiei pulled back quickly, though still nearly clutching my waist. The man in the cloak stood on the balcony.

"Ah, romance," the man said. "No wonder a criminal like you would help her."

I felt Hiei's hands tighten. I stared fearfully at the man, then at Hiei, whose claws were digging into my sides now. I bit my lip, not saying a word for fear of Hiei, or the man in the cloak's reaction. Hiei gave a low growl.

"Are you gonna fight this time, or are you gonna run away like always?" Hiei snapped.

The man's face shifted into a glower- I could tell by his eyes. Hiei's hands left my waist, still leaving a hot tingle there. Hiei removed his katana from its sheath and pointed it at the man.

"Show me who you are," he demanded, taking on a tone of superiority.

"Why should I?" The man said suavely.

"Because you know you can't beat me," Hiei replied smoothly, sending shivers up my spine.

"We'll see about that," the man said, charging Hiei.

"Fool," Hiei grumbled. "No one makes a direct attack at me!"

Hiei slashed at the man with his katana, then halted, seeing he was no longer there.

"Don't underestimate me, Hiei," the man said, wrapping his elbow around Hiei's throat. "I've come to get what I want, and I will get it."

"And… what is it… that you want?" Hiei choked.

"Her," he gestured toward me. "She has something within her that I want. I'll take it in anyway that I can."

"Sorry," Hiei said, a smirk playing on his lips, "But I can't let you do that."

With that, he stabbed his katana backwards, straight through the man's left side. He jumped away and reappeared on the balcony. His breath was harsh- proving that he was furious.

"I'll be back," he said gruffly, and vanished as always.

Hiei thrusted the katana back to his sheath, muttering various curses under his breath. Then he turned to me.

"Well, now we know," was all he said, retreating from the room.

(Hiei's POV)

"What were you DOING?!" I thought wildly, quickly making my way to my bedroom. "If that guy hadn't showed up you would have…"

I felt my cheeks warm, something they rarely did- that I realized anyway, and I closed my door behind me. I sat on my bed and stared in the mirror.

"Though it would have been nice, I suppose," I said softly, "To know if she liked it or not… or if I liked it or not… Hell, it might cure some of these weird thoughts!… Or enrage them…"

I fell onto my back and sighed. "Damn it. Damn it. Damn it."

I closed my eyes. I knew I couldn't get carried away with her. If Koenma found out, he'd never let me see her again, and by now, it seemed, she was the only thing keeping me alive. Besides, I had things to do. I needed to sneak into Reikai, get the files and…

_But you don't want to._

"No… I don't." I thought reluctantly. "I wanna go back to her… but… I can't. I just can't."

_Go, go. She's the first one you've ever felt this way about…_

"No… it's probably a bit of lust…" I argued with myself.

_No, this one's different. You know that. You don't want to satisfy yourself with a one night stand. This is different._

"No… it's not! It's not different it's-"

A knock came at my door, very softly, but a knock none-the-less. I rose up, and put my weight on my hands.

"Er… come in?"

"Um…" Botan stepped in.

(A/N: You guys probably hate me now, huh? Don't worry, I'll have the next chapter up soon. I just felt like writing a cliff hanger. And, well, it's one fifteen a.m. and I'm sleepy. See you next chapter!)


	11. Finally Getting It

Chapter Eleven: Finally Getting It

(Hiei's POV)

"Botan…" I said, surprised for some reason.

"Yes, um… I'm… kinda scared…" she admitted, watching her feet.

I blinked. Of course she would be frightened. That guy was showing up more and more and her dreams weren't helping either.

"So…" I said. "What do you want to do?"

"I… I don't know… I'm just… scared!" She looked on the verge of tears again.

I sighed slowly and hopped off my bed, walking over to her. "Botan, you can't live your life in fear. Otherwise he'll win. Look…" I placed a hand on her shoulder. "You're a strong girl, and I'm right here in case you need me."

"I… I…" she sniffled.

I rolled my eyes. "You're not gonna listen to me are you?"

She smiled softly and shook her head. "I just don't feel safe… not without you with me…"

I felt my cheeks warm, fighting to keep them from turning scarlet. My hand slid off her shoulder and into my pocket.

"Fine. Lay down." I pointed to my bed.

She blushed wildly. "What about-"

"There's plenty of room," I stated feeling a small laugh at how uncomfortable she was. I was feeling a bit uneasy myself. It seemed to be getting awfully hot in there.

She moved toward the bed and sat, staring at me with those pinkish-violet orbs, making sweat trail on the back of my neck and on my palms. Was I nervous? Was that possible?! I could see her curves through her pajamas, especially the way she was sitting, her knees together, feet apart, so childish but, dare I say, cute, something I knew nothing about. She tucked a piece of that pastel blue hair behind her ear, trying to concentrate on something other than the awkward situation.

"I could just sleep on the floor in your room," I suggested quickly.

"N-no. This is fine…" she said, falling to her side on the bed, eyes emotionless for probably the first time in her life.

"Are you sure?"

"Why do you care what I think?" she asked, smiling softly.

"I… I don't know…" I admitted unwillingly. "I just do."

"Hiei… something's been bothering me," her voice ripped at my soul.

"What is it?" I asked, fearing the answer.

"Once we beat this guy… will things really go back to the way they were before?"

It wasn't what I expected. Slowly, I took a seat beside her on the bed. She sat up as well.

"I… I don't know that either… Do you want them to?"

"This might be surprising, but no…"

"Me neither."

"What?" She seemed shocked.

"I must say that you've grown on me…" I closed my eyes, not believing I was admitting all this. "You're a good girl, a good woman. You look out for everyone. And you've got heart- God, you've got heart- and I like that. Surprising, ne?"

She nodded. "I like having you around too. You've got this mindset that brings me down to earth. It feels so good to not be up in the clouds all the time. When I'm around you, I feel like I don't have to put on a show. All I have to do is be myself. You can be cold, but deep down… you're a wonderful man. You know how to take care of someone. If you ever have a girlfriend, I know she'll be happy."

I felt my cheeks warm again and I found that I didn't want to bother stopping the reddening. I felt… honestly, flattered. No one had seen me that way before- not to mention tell me that I was that way. She truly knew me better than I knew myself, and she had no idea. I let my hand slip from my knee to the blanket, where it landed on her hand. We both stared for a moment, then let it stay.

"I was a curse as a child," I started talking without knowing again. "My mother slept with a fire demon, causing her to have a twin boy and girl, when the koorimes were an all female race. I was dropped off the island. I survived. I was picked up by some thieves that cared for me until I was about six or seven, when they beat me up and stole the only memory I had of my mother- my Hiruseki stone. Then I decided to get a jagan from Shigure. He wanted my Hiruseki stone, so I promised him Yukina's- if I ever came in contact with her. That's another reason I don't want her to know I'm her brother…

I went back to my village not long ago. I got this scar on my back for doing so. Turns out my mother killed herself in grief. Yukina had been with Ruri- my mother's best friend- the whole time. Ruri was dead too. They attacked me. In my grief and anger, I destroyed the entire village and everyone in it on accident… I made Yukina cry…"

I hadn't realized how much I had said, but I had seen Botan's tears out of the corner of my eye. My hands were squeezed into fists now, practically shaking. I shook off the overwhelming emotions of my story. Botan's arms suddenly slipped around my shoulders and she rested her head where it had been before.

"I'm sorry," she said. "But I'm glad you told me. Does that mean you trust me now?"

I leaned against her neck and sighed. "Yes. It does."

"It's late," she observed. "We've been up late again…"

"I don't care," I said. "I feel relieved after a long time."

(Botan's POV)

Everything was so new to me all of the sudden. It was as if the wool had been pulled away from my eyes and I was seeing it in a whole new light. Hiei was the most different, but this change had happened gradually within me, without my knowing. It had surfaced now, however. He moved slightly under my arms, but I didn't move at all. I couldn't. His skin as hot against my neck, or perhaps my skin was hot- I didn't know. I was just happy, not the usual cheerful, but a true, wistful happy that seemed to never leave. My arms finally slipped away and I fell back on the bed, sighing.

"I know you trust me. I know that's hard for you to do for anyone. Tell me… how do you feel about me?"

Hiei fell back beside me and closed his eyes. "I wish I knew."

"You know what, Hiei?"

"What?"

"I think I love you…"

(A/N: Woo! I hope you guys aren't too mad. I didn't mean to leave it at a cliffy again, but it was just the most perfect ending line to the chapter, I had to stop it there! Well, I'll have the next chapter up soon. Ja!)


	12. Emotion

Chapter Twelve: Emotion

(Hiei's POV)

Those words were uttered from her lips. My heart… my entire body… my entire soul… froze. Her hand still gripped mine. I shook off the shock, sat up and stared down at her, hair sprawled around her on the sheets.

"Are you… joking?" I said, feeling my voice shuddering.

"I don't think so," she said, sitting up as well. "I've just… never felt this way about anyone before…"

She looked at me for a moment, then quickly stood, nearly running to the door. "I-I'm sorry- I'll go…"

"Botan, wait a minute." I found myself saying.

She stopped and looked at me again. Her eyes had tears piling in the bottom rims of them. It made my heart wrench again, though I showed no proof of it. She bit her lip.

"Yes?"

"I didn't ask you that to offend you," I said. "I just… didn't expect it is all."

"Well, I'm not really that sure… really…" Her eyes wandered around the room, gazing at anything but me.

"You're not sure of anything, are you?" I smiled, something strange for me.

"No," she beamed. "I never am."

Another few minutes passed by that seemed like hours. Her smile faded.

"I am sorry… I feel like… such a burden. And now, I must be some freak to you…"

"No. You're not," I said, feeling a bit of emotion rise in my voice. I forced it back down. "You're not a burden and you're not a freak… That's my job." I smirked at her.

She smiled sadly at me then headed back toward the bed. "We should get some sleep."

"Botan?"

"Yes?…"

"Did you mean that?"

"What?"

"Did you mean that," I demanded.

Silence. She nodded slowly and sat on the bed. Those tears were visible streaks on her cheeks.

"How did this happen?" she whispered. "I'm such an idiot…" She began weeping. She buried her face in her knees and began to sob. "God, I'm so sorry, Hiei!"

I approached her slowly and lifted her chin. "Sorry for what, exactly?" I raised an eyebrow.

"I… I thought you would hate me… for even thinking such a thing…"

"I don't hate you," I said. "After everything that's happened, how the hell could I?"

Her eyes widened slightly, then fluttered tears away. I wasn't sure what happened next. I lingered there, so close to her face that I could feel her breathing. She whispered something like, "This is not right," and tried to push away, but my arms held her tightly in place. She stared at my hands then gazed into my eyes in wonderment. Those eyes… so tantalizing… so alluring…. They were driving me mad on the inside, filling me with emotions I had never felt before, rising, rising, RISING! Her lips were hanging on air, warm air that filled me inside. Everything, every bit of control I had gained over my many years of solitude, vanished, disappeared, dissolved. I slammed my lips to hers, wanting, NEEDING her, with all that I was. She let out a soft gasp, then melted into me. How I had longed for this feeling, this feeling of redemption, this feeling of being wanted, this… everything…. It was all her, my redemption… my beloved… my everything…

(Botan's POV)

I had never felt this way before…ever. Perhaps it was what he was sending into me, this feeling of dying need. That dying need was sweeping through me, making me want him so badly. I felt myself falling backwards slowly onto the sheets, his hands stroking my face softly, let longingly. I broke away in need of oxygen, however. His crimson eyes were bright with fury and desire.

"Hiei…" I whispered.

"Please… more…" he returned, almost inaudible. I had never heard this voice from Hiei before. It was as if he was no longer the hateful fire demon, but a child, frightened and alone.

"N-no…" I said quickly, pushing him away. "It's too fast… too fast…"

"Nothing's too fast!" Hiei cried out, pulling me closer.

"Nothing," I gasped as his hand began to rise under my shirt. "Nothi- No!"

I shoved him away. Hiei hit the wall, then stopped and stared at his hands, as in awe of what had just happened.

"My God," he murmured. "What did I do!"

"Hiei…"

Hiei had gone. I slammed my fists down on the bed.

"WHY CAN'T I DO ANYTHING RIGHT!"

(Hiei's POV)

Morning. Ugh. I was exhausted, physically, but mostly mentally. But I still had a mission to do, and I would not stray from that mission again. I trudged into Reikai, yawning. Koenma's office was crowded, as usual, filled with ogres and ferry girls, running around with various stacks of paper. I had to admit, it was strange to not see Botan racing around the room in a frenzy. No, I had to stop thinking about her. I cleared my throat loudly. Everyone stopped and looked at me.

"Where's Koenma," I said in a low growl.

In silence, their hands shifted toward the large double doors. I stomped by them and through those doors to see Koenma, busily writing on the other side. George rushing behind him.

"George," I grumbled. "I wish to speak with Koenma alone."

George stared then ran from the room. He was such a coward. Koenma stopped writing then looked up at me.

"Hiei? What happened?"

"Nothing," I said. "I just want some files. To help Botan."

"What kind of files?" Koenma stated darkly.

"The files of her past life," I replied nonchalantly.

"I'm sorry, Hiei," Koenma returned in a business-like voice, "But I can't allow you to see those files."

"Why the hell not!" I yelled, quickly losing my patience.

"Hiei, only my father or myself can look at those files, and even I have to ask permission. There's no way I'm letting a felon like yourself look at them."

"Even if it means her life!"

"What is so important in those files?"

"I need to know where, how, why, and when she died." I demanded.

"Well, I'm sorry, Hiei. You should ask her."

"She doesn't remember! You and I both know that. Now, give me those files."

"And why should I-"

"Because," I said with a quick flash of my katana. I pointed it to his neck, "I can decapitate you…" then pointed it downward. "Or I can castrate you. Take-your-pick."

Koenma gulped under my glare. He waved George over.

"Um… uh… George, could you, um, get me the key to the files room?"

"But sir-"

"Do it."

"Yes, Koenma-sama."

(Botan's POV)

"Damn," I whispered. "I screwed up big time…"

"Yes, you did." Came a voice in the doorway.

"OH NO! STAY AWAY!"

(Hiei's POV)

"Here," Koenma sighed, defeated.

"Thank you," I said triumphantly.

"You can't leave here with that file!"

"Tch. Watch me." And in a flash I was running back toward Ningenkai, hearing Koenma's curses in my ears. Heck, even I had to laugh at that point.

I halted at Botan's door, thinking things over. Should I go in, I asked myself. After what had happened, I was almost… frightened.

"Get it out of your head, Hiei. You've got things to do." And with that, I stepped inside.

The apartment was just the same as it had been when I left, but there was an eerie silence. Something wasn't right. My heart was beating abnormally as I stepped through the halls, gathering speed as I went.

"Botan? BOTAN!" I threw open my door and found my worst fears.

A broken window. A ruffled blanket. A letter…

(A/N: This story SCREAMS cliffhangers, doesn't it? I know you guys hate me by now. Sorry for the long update. I've been really busy and everything. But here it is. I'll try and have the next one up sooner. I started dreaming up where this story's going next anyways. Hope you liked it!)


	13. Bad Circumstances

Chapter Thirteen: Bad Circumstances

(Hiei's POV)

_Hiei Jaganshi_

_I have taken the girl, but I will not take her power just yet. I consider you a worthy opponent, so I will give you a chance to save her. Meet me in the old warehouse behind my last murder victim's apartment building at three o' clock sharp. If you do not show, I will kill her and take her power. Come alone. If I sense or see any companions, I will kill her. I will get my revenge, but my fight with you comes first. See you there._

_Sasuke_

"Sasuke…" I muttered. "So that's his name. He'll regret ever waiting for me to come."

I crunched the letter in my hand, then punched the wall.

"Look what you've done!" I thought. "You've failed! You've failed your job! But most of all… you failed her."

My fist fell from the wall, and for the first time in my life, I felt… like a coward. I was SUCH a coward! I had been shown a bit of emotion. I had let loose, and that scared the hell out of me… so I ran… and now… she was gone. And it was all my fault. I looked at the clock- eleven o' clock. I had a long time before I had to go there. I sighed and left the bedroom, thinking over a strategy.

"Damn…"

(Botan's POV)

"Erg… Ugh… Wh-where… am I?"

Everything came washing over me quickly, and I soon remembered what had happened, but I still didn't know where I was, even if it did look extremely familiar. I tried to move, but found that I was bound and gagged. Surprise, surprise. Suddenly, a shadow covered the open doorway, my only source of light I could see.

"I see you're awake, Botan," the voice drawled.

THE MAN BEHIND THE CLOAK! My eyes widened and I tried desperately to wriggle out of the ropes.

"Quit trying," he murmured. "Besides…"

He moved into the light and I gasped. His face… I could see his face. His hair was jet black and pulled up high in a ponytail behind his head. His face was a dead pale and his eyes were golden. His face twisted into a fanged grin. He pulled the gag away from my face.

"I'm not going to kill you… yet…"

"Y-yet?"

"You're little boyfriend may be coming to save you. That is… unless he's a coward."

"Hiei will kick your ass!" I yelled, but on the inside, I was having doubts if Hiei would even come after me.

"Ah, quite a bit of confidence in him considering he left you alone long enough for me to capture you." He placed a hand on my face and I bit at him, making him draw back.

"That's none of your business!" I screamed.

He slapped me across the face, making my eyes tear up. "Can it, bitch. We'll see how much he cares. This will be a death day, of either him… or you. Or perhaps both!" And he began laughing.

That laughter. It was bringing something to mind. And his voice… that yelling voice. That anger… Memories began to flood my mind; I couldn't block them out. I could hear things that he'd said before. Like when… he killed me.

"Sa-Sasuke…"

"Huh? How did she-"

"You killed me… I… will… get you… for this…" And everything went black.

(Hiei's POV)

I slid my katana onto my back sheath. I was wearing a black t-shirt and ripped up blue jeans. I needed to blend in with the humans on my way to fight. I couldn't have people following me. This could get messy. I tied a black scarf around my head and stared in the mirror. My eyes widened when I caught a glimpse of red. I turned quickly.

"Tell me, Hiei," Kurama said. "Why are you so solemn?"

"How did you get in here?" I snapped half-heartedly.

"Through the window. YOUR window to be exact. I noticed it was broken and there were traces of a demon's energy. So, I thought I would stop by."

"You've always been a sneaky one, Kurama."

"What's been happening? Where's Botan?"

"Look, I can't explain now. She's in danger and I have to go save her on my own. Otherwise, she'll be killed. I… I gotta go." I began to walk towards the front door when Kurama caught me off guard.

"You love her, don't you?"

I halted. "Everyone does. Who can't?" I smiled to myself.

I left Kurama in the living room. I had to get going. I could be late. At top speed, I zipped through the city, unnoticed. I thought I could have walked before, get my mind straight, but it seemed that just wouldn't work. I didn't want to risk losing her because I was confused with myself. I could still feel that tingle, her lips on mine. What a fool I was, lunging at her like that. If I saved her… would she care?

(Botan's POV)

"He's here." Sasuke muttered, smirking. "Perfect."

"Wh-what are you p-p-planning?" I stammered.

He turned back to me. "Shut up if you know what's good for you."

"F-ck off!" I yelled, taking him by surprise. I didn't care. I was so sick of him, of the torture he had made me endure.

"You see, I've TRIED THAT!" He slammed be against the wall and I winced in pain. "Only YOU wouldn't let me. I'll have that power. I promise you that."

"Wh-what?"

"SASUKE!" A familiar voice rang through the warehouse.

He dropped me. I landed on the floor, right next to a large brownish-red stain. Blood. Definitely not recent. I looked up to see Hiei with his fists clenched. He looked extremely angry.

"Hello, Hiei. I see you came after all."

"Of course I did. What? Did you think I wouldn't?" Hiei spat.

"Well then, shall we fight?"

"No, not with her in the way." Hiei demanded. "We will fight elsewhere, where she won't get hurt."

"Well, you see, Hiei, she's in MY possession, therefore, I decide where she resides while we fight. If you have a problem with it, I can kill her."

"Erg…" Hiei growled, then sighed. "Fine."

"Good!" With that, Sasuke disappeared.

"Damn!" Hiei yelled. "Come out of hiding, coward!"

He quickly raced to me and began to untie the ropes.

"Did he hurt you?" He asked in a hurry.

"N-not really. No."

"Good. Now get out of here."

"I can't leave here now!"

"Look you have to- AGH!" Sasuke grabbed Hiei by his hair and pulled him up.

"HIEI!"

"GET THE HELL OUT OF HERE NOW!" Hiei screamed before Sasuke slammed him into a wall. "THESE WOUNDS ARE NOTHING!"

I froze. I could just leave him there, but as long as I was in range of Sasuke, I knew that Hiei wouldn't fight at his best. I nodded, and took off into a run, trying to escape.

"Fists of the Mortal Flame!" Echoed Hiei's voice off the walls.

I kept running. I would find a place to watch where they couldn't see me. I had to make sure he was okay. After all…

He was fighting for me, wasn't he?

(Hiei's POV)

Sasuke fell backwards, leaving me to get my bearings. He was quite sneaky. I let out a long breath. He was as hard as I had expected, but I didn't know what he was planning either. I gathered my guard again as Sasuke stood.

"Not bad, though it was predictable," he said, wiping blood from his lip.

"Same to you, I suppose," I growled. "Let's just get this over with. Quit playing and fight."

"Fair enough," Sasuke replied before disappearing again.

I stood my ground.

(Botan's POV)

I halted in my spot, right before the door. Something was piercing my heart. Something bad was about to happen. I knew it.

"I have to know…" I murmured, turning around, running back. I knew Hiei would be distracted, but at least he wouldn't be dead!

(Hiei's POV)

"Where is he?" I thought frantically. I could sense him at all! "WHERE IS HE!"

I pulled the scarf away from my forehead and opened my jagan. I smirked. With my jagan, I would most likely have the upper hand. I closed my eyes, my jagan feeling out his energy, his breathing. I turned. I would have him this time! Just as I knew my fist would hit his face, I felt a piercing pain throughout my entire being.

(Botan's POV)

"HIEI!" I screamed out.

Sasuke had a syringe, or what seemed to be, and had injected it into Hiei's jagan. Hiei was frozen in his spot, ghostly white, eyes large and dilated. I felt agony within me that none could match.

"You… you hurt him… you bastard… what did… you do!"

Sasuke began laughing. HE BEGAN LAUGHING! Everything went blank for a moment. It was all a large, blue blur.

(Hiei's POV)

"Wh-what?" I choked as a large blue blast hit Sasuke square in the chest.

I turned shakily as my knees hit the floor. Botan was standing there, tears streaming down her face. She was trembling crazily.

"Hiei!" She yelled as she ran to me.

"Wh-what happened to Sasuke?" I asked.

"I… don't know!" Botan cried. "Are you alright?"

"I…"

I didn't want to worry her, but I knew I wasn't 'alright.' My mind was watery in a way. I couldn't concentrate fully on anything. Every muscle, every bone in my body ached horribly. My heart was beating faster than normal. I felt nausea plaguing me. But worst of all, my jagan was pulsing, sending lightning like bolts through out my body.

"Hiei?"

I couldn't speak. Everything was going away into a blackness that I didn't want to see.

"I… I…"

I passed out.

(Botan's POV)

"N-no… Hiei… wake… up…" I breathed, lifting him upward, examining his face.

The jagan was changing a bright crimson color and was glowing a violent black.

"HIEI!"

I had to get help. There was only person I knew that might have been able to help him. So, with that in mind, I lifted Hiei onto my back, even if he was a bit heavy, and began running at full speed out of the building, where I would summon my oar and be off…

Off to Genkai's…

(I'm not as proud as this chapter as I thought I would be. O.O I dreamed it up so much better than that. I just couldn't find the very exact words just now. I don't think this one was as much of a cliffy as the others, and don't worry if you think so, because, since it's SPRING BREAK, I'll have the next chapter up soon. And no, Hiei's not gonna die. Thanks for not getting TOO mad at the cliffies! See you next chapter!)


	14. Pains of the Mind and Heart

Chapter Fourteen: Pains of The Mind and Heart

(Yusuke's POV)

"Seriously? Never thought those two would live together," I said, raising my eyebrows.

Kurama took a sip of his tea and set it back down.

"I'm glad Hiei's found a friend," Yukina, said, a soft smile on her face.

"I'm worried, though. You said Hiei was going off to battle?" Genkai asked.

"Yes," Kurama said. "I don't think he knew much about his enemy either. He told me not to come or Botan would be killed. I hope that everyone's okay."

"Why was Botan taken hostage anyway?" Kuwabara asked, confused.

"Well, I'm sure we'll find out soon," Shizuru replied, a look of worry upon her features.

Keiko seemed that she was about to speak when the door slid open. Everyone gasped and I quickly got up to help Botan, along with Kuwabara. She was standing in the doorway, Hiei slung over her shoulders, crying and drenched in rainwater. There was quite a storm outside.

"I had to quit flying because of the lightning," she said softly. "Please help Hiei… Genkai…"

"What? Why me-" Genkai stared down at Hiei. "Oh, my God…"

(Botan's POV)

I hit my knees. "Please tell me he'll be okay… it was because he was saving me…" I felt tears spilling over my cheeks.

Genkai's face was grave. "What happened?"

"H-Hiei was fighting… an-and… Sasuke… stabbed his jagan with… a… with a needle… of some sort."

"I see… Kurama, get him into the back, will you. Yukina, get me some ice water. Shizuru, get some blankets. Keiko, set up a futon in the back with Kurama. Kuwabara, Yusuke, you two contact Koenma immediately and tell what's been going on around here, all that you know anyways. Botan," Genkai's voice changed from the demanding to a soft, motherly voice, "Get yourself cleaned up, okay?"

I nodded and stumbled out of the room, into the back. I stepped into Yukina's room and slid the door shut behind me. I dropped out of the clothes I was wearing and moved over to the closet. Yukina had some haori that didn't fit. I would wear one of those. I slid one on and tied it at the waist. Then, I ripped my hair out of it's ponytail, feeling the wet locks douse my shoulders. The door opened behind me. I turned. Shizuru stood with a cigarette in her mouth. Her eyes were saddened.

"Look at you," she said. "You're torn up."

"Uh huh…" I choked. "This is all my fault…"

"No, and don't go telling yourself that, because it's not." Shizuru put a comforting hand on my shoulder. "Now, mind telling me what's been going on?"

"Could you… please not tell?" I knew I could trust Shizuru with this, even though I was positive Hiei wouldn't want anyone to know.

"Of course. Now, sit down, and tell me everything, okay?" She smiled at me.

I cried out and threw my arms around her, sobbing uncontrollably. "OH, SHIZURU! I FEEL SO HORRIBLE!"

"Shhh… shhh… it's alright," she said, stroking my back.

"Okay… okay…" I regained my composure. "I'll start from the beginning…"

(Kurama's POV)

"Could you explain what's wrong with Hiei, Genkai?" I asked as I covered Hiei with a blanket.

"He's quite wounded."

"He doesn't look-"

"Mentally."

"Mentally wounded?" Yusuke asked, raising an eyebrow. "How can you be mentally wounded?"

"Yeah, how?" Kuwabara returned.

"Well, that needle punctured Hiei's jagan. Whatever was in that needle was injected into Hiei's jagan, and his state of mind. Hiei's jagan is reacting to it. It could kill him, to be honest."

I felt like I had been hit hard in the back of my head. "WHAT!"

"I can fix it, but it's going to be painful. It'll be worse than when he got it implanted in his forehead."

"What are the odds of his survival?" I asked.

"Forty to sixty tops," Genkai sighed. "But it's better than the odds he's got right now."

"Wh-what?" Everyone turned and saw Botan and Shizuru in the doorway.

"I'm going to save him, don't worry. It's up to Hiei's willpower if he wants to survive."

"Then he will," Botan smiled.

I nodded. "He will."

"Now, I suggest you leave, Botan."

"Why?"

"Because… I don't think you could take it… and the boys, I'd ask them to leave, but they'll probably have to hold Hiei down."

"Mmn?" Yusuke's eyes widened slightly.

"That's right. He'll struggle."

"Damn," Kuwabara muttered. "I didn't know that."

"Okay," Botan whispered, then left the room quickly, Shizuru at her heels and Yukina waiting from behind the door.

"Alright… here we go…" Genkai moved Hiei's bangs from his face and formed her hands over his jagan. "Hold him down."

"Right," the three of us said.

Genkai bit her lip and closed her eyes, sending energy within the jagan.

Suddenly, Hiei began screaming crazily jerking and writhing. Various things in the room began to set aflame. I pinned Hiei's arms down while Yusuke and Kuwabara fought to keep his legs down. Hiei's eyes were wide and agonizing.

"NO! STOP! STOP IT PLEASE!" he cried.

Genkai shot another jolt throughout his body. Hiei's throat went hoarse and blood trickled down his lip. Then, his screaming stopped. His moving stopped. Everyone seemed relieved… except Genkai. She still held her hands over his forehead. Her eyes went wide. Hiei's body suddenly went into convulsions.

"Oh, God. Kurama! Get Yukina! Yusuke, Kuwabara, give him energy!"

I quickly threw open the door and halted for a moment.

"Botan…"

She was sitting against the wall, trembling and covering her ears. I had no time. I ran off after Yukina.

(Botan's POV)

I had heard it. That was all I needed to hear to hate it. Hiei's screams were… horrifying. They were not the screams of a man, but of a child… a child… who had seen to much. I began sobbing again, burying my head in my knees.

"Please… please… let him be okay…"

(Genkai's POV)

This wasn't good. Hiei's jagan controlled much of his body and now his entire being was fighting back, though he didn't want it to. He began choking and gasping for air.

"Hang on, Hiei! It's almost over!" Yusuke yelled, then looked at me. "Isn't it?" He murmured.

I nodded. "This is the last one!"

Yukina and Kurama burst into the room. Hiei's eyes were dripping with black pearls, spilling everywhere onto the floor. His face was stony. I closed my eyes, praying that he would make it, then, reluctantly, shot the last blast into his jagan.

(Botan's POV)

Hiei's scream killed me on the inside. I had to see him. I slammed the door open and stared around frantically. Everything was whirling around. His pain… I could feel his pain within me. I dropped to the floor.

"Don't… die… Hiei…. Please don't die!"

Black.

"Botan? Botan, wake up!"

My eyes opened. Keiko was staring down at me. I jolted upward.

"WHERE IS HE!"

Keiko fell backwards in surprise. She pointed out the door. I threw the covers off and flew to the room where I flung the door upon. Genkai looked over her shoulder at me.

"Botan, I see you're awake now."

"I…" I looked at Hiei. "Is he…"

"He's resting now. He made it, but his mind is gonna be pretty open now. He'll probably have some pretty bad nightmares."

"Genkai… you look tired," I stated.

She nodded. "It's quite a powerful spell. I'm a bit worn out, to be honest."

"Go rest. I'll stay with him."

"Thank you. Now, tell me, Botan. What is your connection to Hiei?"

"C-connection?" I blushed slightly.

"Yes."

"Well… as of right now… we're friends."

"That's good to know," Genkai yawned, stood, and headed out the door. "You know… I always thought this would happen."

"What?" I turned.

She was gone.

(A/N: Back in the league! Two chapters in two days! My obsession returns! My creativity is back! Alright!)


	15. The Only Light

Chapter Fifteen: The Only Light

(Botan's POV)

Hiei was shifting uncomfortably and muttering in his sleep. I knew why. It was exactly as Genkai had said. Hiei's memories were beginning to haunt him. It frightened me. I knew the one thing that COULD kill Hiei would definitely be… those… memories… I brushed some hair from his face and place a cold, wet cloth on his forehead. His jagan was closed. His eyes twitched slightly as he fought an inner battle of fear and sorrow. I bit my lip, feeling tear welling in my eyes again.

"Don't worry… you- you can fight it… you're strong…" I choked.

(Kurama's POV)

"I think… there's more behind this than friendship," I murmured.

"Yes, so do I. My brother seems to have taken quite a liking to her…" Yukina said.

I gasped. "Yukina, you-"

"Of course I know!" She beamed at me, though her eyes were sad. "Those tear gems… they could have given it away anyway."

I leaned down and took one between my thumb and forefinger. "They're… black."

"I suppose you could say they're part of the curse…"

"The curse?"

"Come, I shall explain."

(Hiei's POV)

Everything was upon me, like a flood of memories with no light, drowning me in my own sorrows. I was clawing and groping, hoping, praying for anything to save me. It was all dark. All ebony blackness. Then, something shined, and I heard a voice.

"Don't worry… you- you can fight it… you're strong…"

All those horrid dreams swept away and I was surrounded by this bright white light. My eyes suddenly opened, and I could see her face, those crying violet-pink eyes, that powder blue hair, those soft lips, all watching over me. Her eyes were squinted shut in sorrow, making my heart wrench. She shouldn't have been crying for a lost soul such as I. I felt my trembling hand lift and brush against the cheek of her skin. My weakness was unbearable, and yet…

I still smiled…

(Botan's POV)

"Wh-what?" My eyes shot open, teardrops staining the koorime's face. "H-Hiei…"

His eyes were so tired, but he seemed so relieved. He was actually smiling at me. SMILING.

"Hey," he breathed.

"Y-you okay?"

"I think so…"

"R-really!"

He nodded softly. I couldn't stand it. I took him into my arms and embraced him tightly, weeping softly.

"Oh, thank God! Oh, Hiei!"

His hands trailed up and rested on my back. His head rested on my shoulder. He let out a soft breath, warming my shoulder slightly. His hands began to tangle in my hair. I pulled him tighter. He whispered something in my ear. I had no idea what he said.

"What?"

"I love you," his voice pierced my ear.

I gasped, my hands tightening around his form. My face warmed copiously. Such words… I never thought Hiei would ever speak them with the chance that others could hear.

"Hi-hi-… Hiei…" I whimpered.

He squeezed me tightly, breathing a bit harshly. I buried my face in his shoulder. How I had longed for this over such a short time. I could feel it, every bit of pain he had ever felt seeping into my skin.

"I don't care what happens… just don't leave me…" he whispered raucously.

"I won't. I won't." I assured.

"You're the only light… the… only… light…" He slid away from me and back onto the futon, asleep.

"Good… maybe he'll rest that way."

I lay down next to him, my hand on his chest. Exhaustion ached in my bones. My eyelids slowly dropped.

"Maybe I will too…"

(Shizuru's POV)

"So, she was telling the truth," I muttered, leaning against the doorway, popping another cigarette into my mouth. "Good. They both needed it."

I slid the door shut and headed down the hall, into the room we were in when Botan made her unexpected appearance. I saw someone leaning against the wall.

"Hello, binkie-boy."

"Don't call me that," Koenma replied. "Where's Hiei- and Botan for that matter?"

"Why do you wanna know?" I asked, flipping my hair behind me.

"You know very well what I need to talk to them about," Koenma replied with a scowl on his face- one that didn't suit his features.

"Maybe I don't," I growled. "Why don't you fill me in?"

"I asked him to do a job for me and he went and put her in danger, AND took files from me!"

"You're gonna fire him, aren't you?" I asked, exasperated.

"OF COURSE I AM!"

"Oh, no, you're not!" I grabbed him by the collar and threw him against the wall. "You have no idea what kinda f-cking hell he went through to save her do you! If you're gonna fire him, you're gonna have to go through ME."

Koenma shrunk down, intimidated.

"What the hell?" He asked quickly.

"Tell me," I said, my voice softening. "Do you know how love feels?"

Koenma was surprised to say the least. "I… I don't know."

"Then keep your mouth shut before I put my fist in it!" I snapped, before taking on a lighter, sarcastic tone. "Now, I don't think you're needed here anymore, ARE you, Koenma-sama?"

He shook his head quickly and left immediately.

"Tch, that's what I thought," I grumbled, then left, angrier than before. "Stupid baby… doesn't have any clue…"

(Hiei's POV)

I opened my eyes slowly, feeling this overwhelming feeling of peace, something I hadn't felt in… well, forever. I glanced to my right and saw Botan, sleeping soundly, her arm draped over me. And as I watched her rest, I felt this tremendous amount of love. I knew it had to be love. It was the way I felt around Yukina, but different.

I felt like an idiot for leaving her alone, but I was relieved that I had saved her in time. I didn't care if it had hurt me- or even if it might have cost me my jagan. I was just happy she was okay. The door slid open and I quickly regained my frown. Even if I DID love her, I didn't have to make it public. Kurama smiled at the position Botan was in and I merely glared at him.

"What?" I snapped.

"Feeling back to your old self, hm?" Kurama joked.

"Hn."

"Most definitely?"

"Hn."

"Botan… she's a good girl," he said reaching down to lift her up.

"Don't move her," I said quickly.

"Huh?" Kurama looked surprised.

"It'll wake her. I'm not going anywhere anytime soon. Just let her stay."

"Well, perhaps you're not completely back to your old self then," He said smiling brightly.

"That's it. You know something I don't, don't you!"

Kurama chuckled and left.

"Hey! Dammit!" I yelled, for I wasn't able to move.

Oh, well. I would just go back to staring at her. She stirred slightly, opening those amethyst oculars to gaze back at me. Her face went into a soft smile.

"Hi," she said, her arm curling around me.

"Hey," I replied.

"Feeling better?"

I nodded. I was, but I still felt a bit weak.

"Do you know what you said to me earlier?"

"Huh?" I blinked. "What?"

"You… said I was your only light… and that you loved me." She blushed slightly.

"I… did?"

"Mmhmm."

I couldn't believe it. In my delirium, my true emotions had come out. But she was smiling, so that was a good thing… right? Unless it was one of those, 'calm before the storm' things.

"Did you mean it?"

Crossroads.

"Let's get out of here," I said quickly, hearing people approaching.

"Yes… let's go home," she beamed at me.

"Feel free, but he'll need to rest," came Genkai's voice.

"EEK!" Botan quickly scooted away from me and I felt the loss of warmth. I fell over with her quick movement.

"Ow."

"Now, Hiei," Genkai replied, ignoring that little scuffle. "You need to pay attention."

"What?"

"Hiei, the wound to your jagan was extremely bad. You almost died back there. YOU. Now that it's fixed, it's still unstable in its current form You need to hold off from using it at ALL COSTS for the next week or so."

"I see…" I murmured, but on the inside was screaming, "WHAT! NO!"

"That's all I can tell you for now. Be careful, Hiei. You've got a lot of people that care about you." She glanced at Botan for a moment. "You wouldn't want to upset them."

"Hn," I replied, half-heartedly.

"Let's go before we're bombarded with questions," Botan giggled, helping me to my feet.

"Mmhmm."

(Okay, I guess I'm stopping the cliffies for now… knock on wood. J Anyway, I hope this chapter wasn't too mushy. I was trying my best to keep him in character in this situation. Hey, it's chapter fifteen, why shouldn't he say he loves her? My old average of 'I love you' or kissing was on the fifth chapter. FIFTH! How pathetic is that! LOL! Hope you guys liked it!)


	16. Explanation

Chapter Sixteen: Explanation

(A/N: Sorry for taking so long! I was deciding on where to go with this chapter, not to mention I've been ABSOLUTELY SWAMPED with schoolwork.)

(Hiei's POV)

A silence filled the room except for the constant ticking of Koenma's feet against the floor. I sat, tense, in a chair, right across from the pacing godling, who was in his teenage form to show how serious he actually was. We were the only ones in the room, Koenma's office to be exact. Botan remained outside with the others. I couldn't help but feel a bit nervous. Koenma halted and turned swiftly to me.

"Hiei," he started.

"Yes?" I said, trying my hardest to keep a straight tone.

"I… need you… to tell me… what happened to Botan."

"I wasn't there," I said, a dark tone in my voice, "I was here… arguing with YOU."

Koenma silenced slightly, then fumed. "YOU CAME HERE!"

"Calm down," I said, still remaining calm. "I came here to help her, not to hurt her. You know that."

Koenma was visibly twitching. I glowered up at him, crossing my legs and my arms. He growled.

"Look," I sighed. "If you want me to stop protecting her, you can tell me not to…"

"The-"

"It doesn't mean I'm gonna listen," I challenged.

"What!" Koenma shouted.

"Look," I said, standing, my voice dropping to a low, intense whisper. "You told me to take this job and I did. If you've got a problem with it now, I'm f-cking sorry, but I'm not going to leave her in danger like that, and I sure as hell am not gonna leave her with another man."

I felt my eyes burning. I felt an extreme rage inside, but I remained calm. Koenma shrunk a bit under my glare.

"Wh-why do you care anyway!" He retorted quickly.

I landed a punch across his face, sending him into his desk, which sent papers everywhere. He stared up at me.

"YOU HIT ME!" He gasped.

"Next time it will be harder. Stay out of my way, and keep your mouth shut… or you're a dead man." I turned and sent a fiery glower over my shoulder.

"You… you've fallen in love with her… haven't you?" Koenma whispered.

I halted, feeling a large pang in the back of my head. My heart slowed for a moment, then slammed against my chest at rapid speed. I closed my eyes and shoved my hands in my pockets.

"How would you know? You've never loved her," I felt like I should have spat venom. "You REFUSED her when she gave her heart to you… AND when she needed you MOST!" I turned and slammed my fist in the wall. "DON'T DARE TALK TO ME LIKE YOU KNOW HER! **YOU DON'T KNOW A THING!**"

Koenma stared at me, dumbfounded and wide eyed as papers around him began to set aflame.

"As I said," I growled. "Next time, you're a dead man."

Koenma stood slowly, his eyes shaded over with his hair.

"Hiei Jaganshi…"

I stopped and turned to him, feeling like I could set him aflame any moment.

"WHAT!"

Koenma lifted his head, eyes on fire. "I hereby fire you from your mission… and I shall make sure that you NEVER see her again."

I felt as if the whole world had collapsed over my head. I was completely, utterly, stunned.

"You can't make me!" I hissed.

"I AM a god, Hiei," Koenma shot.

"No…" I felt a rage raise within me that I had only felt once before- at Sasuke. "You… you… f-cking bastard… I'll… I'll… KILL YOU!"

My skin burned as it changed to the horrid green and I felt my skin split in various places, ripping my shirt at the arms. Fangs bared, I felt flames begin to appear all around us, until Koenma and I were in a circle of fire. Koenma was ghostly white as he fell backwards, staring up at me with such a fear that I had never seen on his face before.

"Say it… again," I commanded.

Koenma only whimpered.

"SAY IT! Give me a RIGHT to kill you. SAY IT AGAIN!"

"Y-you DO LOVE HER! SAY THAT YOU LOVE HER AND I WILL LEAVE YOU BOTH BE!" Koenma cried out, his voice strained.

"Fine." The fire went out. "I'll put it MY way. If you EVER try to make it so I can't see her, I'll rip your f-cking head off and then eat your organs for lunch…"

Koenma stared in horror at me. I turned, changing back to normal and headed back the door. I stopped for a moment and looked over my shoulder.

"Oh, and by the way, I've done that. Ask anyone in Makai. Stay out of my sight." I threw the door shut behind me, hearing it slam and shake against the large doorframe.

(Botan's POV)

"Hiei?" I asked, watching the enraged fire demon storm past me.

"You know, I always hated that toddler," he spat, moving onward as she followed.

"What's wrong?"

"He wanted to fire me… to keep me away… from you."

"WHAT!" I felt shock settle over me.

"He doesn't think I can protect you," he whispered. "And he's probably right. I mean, look what happened!"

"So are you…" I felt myself on the verge of tears. "L-l-leaving?"

"No, I couldn't… I had to be selfish and refuse. I… I couldn't… let him take me… away from you…" He leaned against a wall and sighed. "Dammit…"

"…Hiei…"

"Forget it. He won't be bothering us anymore. Our real worry is Sasuke," Hiei changed the subject, shaking it off, but still seemed a bit shaken. "He's becoming stronger."

"I know," I replied. "I realized that his eye color changed from black to gold."

"That's definitely not good," Hiei replied, taking my hand as we made our way back to Ningenkai. "That change in color means that he's about ten times more powerful than before. I just have to figure out what his power source is and destroy it. Still, I don't see what he wants you for."

"I… I remember something," I pressed my fingers to my temples and closed my eyes. "An orb… it was blue…"

"An orb?"

"Y-yes. An orb."

"What happened?"

"I… I dropped it… just like in that nightmare… and it broke."

Hiei blinked, squeezing my hand in hope of my memory returning.

"Some… sort of… mist…" I murmured, feeling my head beginning to hurt. "That's it; I'm sorry." I was disappointed with myself over such little information.

"Don't feel bad," Hiei returned, pulling his hand from mine and shoving both in his pockets. "This could be more helpful than we know."

"Maybe," I said, following.

"A mist… I wonder if it came from the shattered orb?"

"Maybe it did!" I said, smiling. "Where else would it come from?"

Hiei's mouth twitched in a smile. "Good point. I'm trying to think if this orb is an artifact that I've read about. I guess I'm gonna have to ask Kurama about this whole thing."

"Guess so," I sighed. I really didn't want to bring many people in on this, but everyone else had already seen the effects of what had happened lately.

Hiei let out a long yawn and halted in his footsteps. He glanced over his shoulder at me. I could see a small smile on his lips. I halted as well.

"What?" I stared.

"Nothing," Hiei replied, returning to walking.

"I don't see why I'm so admirable," I thought, laughing.

(Sasuke's POV)

The doors behind me creaked open as I sat with my hands folded, thinking over past events. My hair was down and hanging over my shoulders and black robes. I stared ahead of myself as a woman appeared to my left.

"Sasuke," she pleaded. "I don't understand. Why do you feel you must have this woman's power when you continue to grow more and more powerful anyway?"

"You don't understand, Mine," I replied. "Though the power you give me helps, it will never be as much as I desire from that… wench, Botan. She stole that power from me. It was mine. And I'm going to get it back."

Mine moved in front of me to face me. I admired her for a moment. She had long black curls pouring down her back like ink on paper, for her skin was white and milky, lips blood red. She wore a black leather dress that was very low cut around the chest, had a slit up to the top of the thigh, and had no sleeves. She had black gloves that matched it, trailing all the way up to the elbow. Her eyes were a crystal blue, innocent compared to the rest of her figure.

"Sasuke, I knew this girl before I was reincarnated. She would not steal on purpose."

"Are you sticking up for her?" I hissed, glowering at her.

"N-no! Of course not, Sasuke."

"Good," I replied as she sat on the table in front of me, twirling a piece of my hair around her finger.

I wrapped my arms around her waste and lay my head on her thigh, smirking.

"You're quite hard to figure out, love," I said.

She smiled down at me. "But of course," came her sultry voice. "I'm a woman."

(A/N: A twist it be! Woo! Sorry for taking so long. I know it's not as long as you guy might have hoped, but I'm really busy lately.)


	17. The Mark

Chapter Seventeen: The Mark

(Hiei's POV)

It seemed like it had been forever since we had been in Botan's humble apartment. It was strange, how at ease it made me feel, even with previous events. Something was still bothering me, however. It happened a while back, the first time Sasuke attacked the two of us together… the night he tried to rape Botan.

"Botan," I said softly, taking a seat on the couch, deep in thought.

"Yes?"

"A while back… when Sasuke tried to rape you… if he wanted your power… why didn't he just take it first?"

Botan was silent, but pale. Her eyes told much more than anything. A fear prickled beneath the orbs like lightning.

"I… don't know… Maybe he just thought I was weak."

"That… or it could be something else," I murmured, "Sasuke is a man of business. He wouldn't do that just because you're weak. There's something else involved… there has to be."

"Maybe…" Botan's voice trailed away, "It's the only way… to retrieve the power."

I jumped slightly at the thought and turned to look at her, just to make sure she wasn't joking. Botan was biting her lower lip, seemingly disturbed. Her eyes made their way to me, meeting my own eyes again. For that moment, I felt I truly didn't deserve her gaze. I turned away quickly. Botan was quickly by my side, her hand on my shoulder.

"What?" she asked. "What is it?"

"Doesn't that scare you?" My voice filtered through my thoughts. "I thought you wanted to… you know…"

_"N-no…" she said quickly, pushing me away. "It's too fast… too fast…"_

_"Nothing's too fast!" I cried out, pulling her closer._

_"Nothing," she gasped as my hand began to rise under her shirt. "Nothi- No!"_

_I was slammed against the wall._

She was silent, and it looked like she was remembering the same thing I was. She turned and stared at me, those eyes glistening as they often did.

"…No. It doesn't scare me at all," her voice came wistfully.

"Not one little bit…" Botan murmured, "As long as it's for love, I'm perfectly fine with it. I mean that."

"Sure," I was feeling a bit doubtful at the memory of her shoving me away. I was too needy, that was for sure. I really didn't deserve her.

"What?" she gazed at me, "You don't believe me?"

"I'm going to be honest with you," I muttered, my voice coming a bit harsher than I intended, "I love you-God knows I do-with all my heart. Hell, I'd die and come back if it would make you smile, but…"

"You---you're the one that's scared…"

"I was then and I am now," I growled, moving away from her.

The memory finally sparked in her mind and her eyes grew wide.

"Hi-hiei… I… I was scared then, but I'm not now!"

"Why were you scared then!"

"I… I wasn't s-sure…"

"You knew the moment I kissed you that it was real!" I yelled.

Botan fell to the couch, pale.

"…Didn't you?" I whispered.

"Hiei--"

"You didn't did you…?"

"I know it's real now! That's all that counts!"

"Positive?" I spat.

Botan quieted. "Why are you being so mean!"

"Because… because…"

"BECAUSE!" Botan pushed.

"Because… I love you…"

"What?"

"It hurts… to love someone this much…" I whispered, "I… I have to know… how much you love me… I NEED to know."

"I… I can't say…" Botan said.

My heart cracked and pain washed over me like a waterfall.

"Words can't… describe it…. Have you…ever… loved someone so much…" she sniffled, "That you… cried?"

And I made Botan cry this time…

"This isn't fair. It's not fair, coming together under these circumstances…" I collapsed to the couch, feeling pressure behind my eyes.

The last thing I wanted to see were her tears, and just the mere sight of them was tearing me up on the inside. Why did I always make the ones I loved cry! Why couldn't I show them my heart! Why couldn't I--

"There's always a why… ALWAYS."

Botan's arms wrapped around my neck and she rested her head on my shoulder. "We may have come together under these c-circumstances, b-but we're still together… no matter what…" She sniffed.

"Y-yes," I whispered, my hand trailing to her arm and gripping it. "T-together…"

I turned my head to look at her, and for that moment, I was so mesmerized by her, that I had to stop myself from losing it. Right in her eyes, there was a love that could not be said, right in those tearful eyes. Suddenly, it didn't seem fair that she was always the one that cried. She always let her feelings out to me, yet I only had few and far in between moments where I actually proved that I loved her.

I did; I loved her so much. At that moment, I decided that I would no longer mask myself-not from her. She was my everything, and I wasn't going to lose it. I placed my hand on her cheek, brushing away a few tears with my thumb, then slowly moved my lips to hers. I didn't kiss her right away, however. I stopped a moment.

"I… I love you," I said before slamming my lips to hers.

I felt her gasp against me, then wrap her arms around me, pulling me on top of her. She allowed my tongue to explore her mouth without fight or any struggle. I squeezed my eyes shut, taking her in and reveling in the moment. Never had I felt so relaxed, so perfect. Everything was perfect as long as she was with me, and I believed it. I would never stop believing it. I may have been a dark bastard, but I still had a heart. Well, I did before she stole it of course. It was strange how quickly things like that could come up on people. We pulled away for air, just staring into each other's eyes, dazed and confused, but happy.

"Hiei," she whispered, sending chills up my spine. I loved the way she said my name.

I sat up on my knees, lacing my fingers with hers. "I need to know. Will you always love me?"

"…Always," she said, a small tear running down her cheeks as she smiled.

I placed my hand on her left shoulder, right against her neck, and brushed away her shirt collar.

"It will hurt," I muttered.

"I don't care," she said, wrapping her arms around my chest so they met on my back.

I smiled against her skin, feeling my fangs grow out slightly. I set them to her skin, then sank my teeth into her flesh, feeling blood pour into my mouth. Her grip tightened on my back and she buried her face in my shoulder. I lapped up the blood around it, my hand resting on her hip.

"Mine," I declared softly. "Mine…"

(Botan's POV)

"Yes," I whispered. "I'm yours… I'm yours… I'm yours…"

He pulled off his shirt and placed my lips against his left shoulder, near the neck, right where he had bit me.

"Now, make me yours," he said, pulling my hair down from it's ponytail, making it flow around us for a moment.

I slowly sank my teeth into his skin, not as hard as he had mine-after all, I didn't have the fangs he did and his skin was far harder than mine. I drew blood, tasting it flowing into my mouth. It tasted good, but strange. I knew my powers would probably reject it, but I didn't care. Hiei's hand trailed under my shirt and up my back, making my hair stand on end and sending shockwaves through out my body. His touch was so warm…

For awhile, we just sat there, holding to each other in the darkness. There was this strange connection now, like I couldn't let go. It was magnetic, a gravity between us. Surely, I had felt it before, but now, it was given in strength, in symbol. There was so much beauty in this moment. My eyes welled up with tears. I didn't know why I always cried. I supposed it was a release of some sort. I pulled back, then pressed my lips to his, running my hands through his hair. It was such a wonderful feeling, being with him. It was indescribable. I laced my tongue through his lips, it dancing with his.

He kissed down my neck, paying particular attention to the large bite mark he had left. "This will never leave your skin," he said. "This is proof of our love. The only way either of us will lose it is if the other dies."

"Of course," he whispered against my ear lobe, "That won't happen, as long as I'm around. I won't let anyone hurt you…"

"Hiei," I murmured, pulling him back on top of me, "I'm yours."

(Kurama's POV)

"Things are getting interesting," I said, sipping my mug of hot chocolate.

"Whaddya mean?" Yusuke asked, shoving a brownie in his mouth.

Kuwabara looked up from the video game he was playing, that usual dumb look on his face.

"Koenma and Hiei seemed to have quite a talk earlier. I went into his office to find him quite winded. There were also burn marks on the carpet."

"Really," Yusuke said, interested, "Guess Hiei finally gave the little brat what he deserves. HAH!"

"I think it runs deeper than that, Yusuke," I said, placing my mug down and crossing my legs.

"Ya' think so?" Kuwabara asked, turning off the game station.

"Most definitely. I have a feeling something's been going on while we were away."

"Like what, exactly?" Yusuke asked, a bit wary of my answer.

"Well, we do know one thing," I said, "Upon our return, we discovered that Hiei was living in Botan's apartment."

"Heh heh," Yusuke snickered.

"Koenma ordered to protect her," Kuwabara replied.

"Well, yes, but the real question is to why he was still there AFTER we returned."

"Well, sleeping in a bed every night isn't so bad," Kuwabara asked.

"Neither is sleepin' with a girl!" Yusuke laughed.

"Yusuke, be serious."

"Alright, alright. Do you think there's another enemy?"

"That is what I was getting to. Of course there was another enemy. The question is what is he after and what do Hiei and Botan have to do with it. It's not like they're talking anytime soon."

"What about them? Aren't they getting a little chummy?" Kuwabara asked.

"It wasn't exactly their relationship that I was focusing on," I said flatly.

"But what if that has something to do with it? What if this guy that f-cked up Hiei's jagan is some old jealous boyfriend or something?"

"Interesting point, but I doubt it. If anything, we'll just have to take everything as it comes and figure it out ourselves. My thoughts are that this man is after something Botan has. What, I'm not sure of, but it's definitely her, not Hiei. The fact that Hiei put so much effort into protecting her and saving her, however, is a bit odd to me. Of course… I do believe that he loves her."

"WHAT!" Kuwabara and Yusuke gaped at me as if I'd grown a second head.

"You act surprised."

"Duh, Kurama."

"I think it's been going on awhile, in fact."

"Do you think it's love or lust?" Kuwabara asked.

"That's not really my decision to make," I said, "But Genkai, Yukina, Shizuru, and myself all think he loves her."

"Damn, we're always the last to know," Yusuke pouted.

"No kidding," Kuwabara added, looking betrayed.

"That's not my fault either," I sighed.

(Hiei's POV)

Morning. I could feel the sun on my back, coming from Botan's living room window. As I rose, I felt this overwhelming power that coursed through me like my own blood. I glanced down at my sleeping lover, a soft, frail form in the sun, blue hair sprawled around her. I ran my finger over the bite mark on her neck, then over mine, then kissed her softly.

"My Botan," I whispered, running my hand up the side of her waist, "You're free from this power that's haunted you."

Her arms were around me in a second and she was kissing me. I didn't even know she was awake… but I couldn't have been happier in that moment. For the first time in our lives, we had someone that we could truly cherish, someone that we knew would never leave us. I lay against her breast, inhaling her scent as she ran her hands down my back.

"I love you," she said.

I remained silent. She knew my answer. It spoke loud and clear in that quiet air.

"We should get up."

I groaned. "We should. WILL we is the question."

I raised up and stretched, feeling quite relaxed. She raised up as well, then headed towards the back. I watched her walk, her every movement putting me in a sort of mesmerized daze. I found myself smirking at her back, eyes half-lidded before I managed to shake it off and follow. We showered together.

(A/N: A doctor is being sent to your house at this moment to resuscitate you. I know you had to have passed out after finding out I actually updated this fic. Sorry for taking so long! I got preoccupied and even fell out of the fandom for awhile. It's hard to write about a show you barely get to watch anymore. Well, anyway, here it is, the long awaited Chapter Seventeen. I hope you all liked it. I have a feeling that this'll be over in the next few chapters, but who knows? Oh, and I promise it won't take seven months to update this time…. I feel so bad about that…)


	18. Damn

Chapter Eighteen: Damn

(Hiei's POV)

Botan walked different now. She had more of a sway in her hips that made all her curves move in the right direction. Or perhaps it was just me seeing her differently now. Still, I had to catch myself giving stupid grins at her backside when she was pulling dishes out of the cabinet or what not. This girl had me wrapped around her finger! ME! The scary part was that I didn't mind it at all.

It was almost routine now, our days, and I'd never been so happy, though I never really smiled unless we were alone. Of course, when we were alone, other… things… happened quite often. I'd watch her fold clothes or one of the random household chores and wrap my arms around her back, blowing on the back of her ear. Oh, how she hated but loved it so! I personally enjoyed watching her squirm. Yes, we were strange, but we were happy. I felt like I had finally found someone in the world that actually loved me, or could it have been vice versa? I grew tired of contradicting myself and tossed the thought to the side.

My power had increased substantially. I really didn't know what to do with all of it. Sometimes the most normal of motions accidentally sent a blast into the wall. I had to be careful when I stretched now. I had also begun to notice small changes in my appearance with this new power. I'd grown just a bit-not too much-taller with just a bit more muscle. My features had grown softer. I didn't think power would make one handsome, but I didn't really know what this power beheld anyway. Either way, Botan enjoyed the changes, and the energy I tended to have at nights. Yes, we had become two lovers, like a trashy romance novel, but with far more love involved.

And we enjoyed every single minute of it.

(Koenma's POV)

"You think… they are… together?" I stared at the Tantei with disbelief.

"It would explain your office, man," Yusuke said, pointing to the various burn marks around the room.

"Yes, I suppose it would… but… how… I… can't comprehend that."

"Yeah, neither can I," Yusuke replied.

"That, however, is not why we are here," Kurama added. "We worried more about the attacks that brought these two together."

"I can see why you would be," I muttered, staring at my hands, "I, myself, am also worried." I failed to mention that I already knew of their relationship. Ignorance made me look better. Still, the attacks did worry me.

"What do you think it's all about?" Kuwabara asked, fingering one of my books on my desk.

"Not sure. Botan seems to have an idea, but she won't tell me. Although…" A thought struck me.

I quickly called in Jorge. "Jorge!"

"Yes, Koenma-sire?" he asked, quickly rushing in.

"Get me Botan's file."

"Yes sir." He rushed off.

He quickly returned with the file and I took it with delicate hands. I sighed. "Hiei was trying to get this when Botan was kidnapped."

"Really…" Kurama got that inquisitive look in his eye.

I opened the folder. "I figure it must have something to do with all this."

(Hiei's POV)

"Ow…" I flinched for the fortieth time.

Botan finally looked up from the TV from her spot on my chest. "What is it, Hiei?"

I gingerly ran my fingers of the scarf that covered my jagan. "Nothing."

"Don't you lie to me, Mister."

"It's just my jagan hurting. Genkai said it might."

"O…kay…" she seemed unconvinced.

Genkai never said it would hurt. In fact, it had had a dull ache in it ever since I had mated. I worried about the new power I had received, but I didn't want to let it show. Still, these new spikes of pain were really starting to bother me and her as well.

"Let's go visit Genkai," I said, hoping I wouldn't worry her.

"Alright."

I grabbed my jacket and hers and we both headed out the door.

(Later, Hiei's POV)

"Why don't you go see Yukina," I said as the oar disappeared beneath us, both landing on our feet.

Botan gave me a look, but shrugged and walked off in search of my sister. I sighed, worry plaguing me now that she was gone. Genkai stepped out on her porch, a cup of tea in her hand. She eyed me in surprise.

"Hiei."

"Genkai, I must speak with you in private… if that's okay."

"Certainly, come on in."

I followed Genkai inside and sat down on one of the pillows at her table. She slid the door shut and locked it.

"What's going on, Hiei? I sensed your worry from my porch. That's highly unlike you."

"My jagan's been bothering me," I put simply. "Sharp pains every twenty minutes or so, and the time is getting shorter in between."

Genkai looked troubled, her eyes set in a frown. "When did it start?"

"Um…" I wasn't sure how to explain. "I've recently acquired… some new power…"

"How?"

"Uh…" I felt my face warm-MY face. I couldn't believe it.

"Pardon?"

I fidgeted, watching my fingers fall over themselves. I couldn't bring myself to say it. It wasn't her business.

"You know, Hiei… I am not one to pry… and I am not one to tell of secrets either."

"Alright, fine," I said, then added in a low voice. "I… mated…"

My face was red hot now.

"Ah, I see. Botan, I presume."

Now I couldn't look her in the eye. She was so calm about this!

"Yes…"

"Hiei, did you not think about the power inside her?!"

"Yes I did!" I snapped back. "Why do you think I did it?!"

"To get her power?!" Genkai looked furious.

"NO! Well, kind of. I didn't want her to have it because it left her open to attack…."

"I see," she said. "I apologize for my assumption."

"It's fine, I- AH!" I gripped my forehead, pain searing through it.

"Stay still," she demanded, pulling the scarf from my forehead.

As the air hit my jagan I bit my lip. Genkai pressed her palm against my jagan and handed me a pillow.

"What's this for?"

"To muffle your scream. It will hurt."

"What-" I had hardly gotten the word out when pain blasted into my forehead.

I bit into the pillow and squinted my eyes shut.

(Botan's POV)

"So, how have you been, Botan?" Yukina asked, fingering a lovely flower in Genkai's garden.

I smiled, "Pretty good considering the circumstances."

"And Hiei?"

"He… well… I don't know."

"What's wrong, Botan?"

"I think he's hiding something from me."

"Like what?"

"I don't know, but I can tell he's worried about something. He's been suffering from some pain too."

"Well, maybe we should go check on him," Yukina suggested with a smile, "Hm?"

"Yeah, I think we should," Botan replied, standing.

(Hiei's POV)

I was shaking. I felt sick. Genkai removed her hand from my forehead. My muscles gave out and I nearly fell over, only being caught by Genkai grabbing my shirt.

"Wh-what the hell… did… you do?" I breathed back gags.

"I had to see what was going on. You'll black out in a second."

"What? I-" Darkness.

(Genkai's POV)

Hiei went limp, eyes glowing a bright blue, masking out his pupils.

"Oh, God…" I sighed. "It's too much for the guard I put on your jagan…"

I removed the guard with a frown upon my face. This was going to make things more difficult for him. He twitched for a moment, then his eyes rolled back into focus, becoming normal again.

"Hiei, do NOT use your jagan."

"At all?" he asked meekly.

"Not at all. Don't. It could KILL you now. I had to take the guard off or the power would have taken you over."

"F-ck," he hissed. The door slid open suddenly and he sat up like nothing was wrong.

"Yes, I'd like some tea, Genkai-san," he said, eyeing Botan and Yukina warily.

"Certainly," I said in a business-like tone. "Yukina, please aid me." I glanced at Hiei, the young girl in my wake. The door slid shut.

(Botan's POV)

"Hiei?"

Worry plagued my heart. He had his head in his hands, a sign that things were not well, and he was shaking just slightly.

"God DAMN IT!" he yelled, kicking the table.

I jumped back. He looked at me as if he hadn't seen me come in then sighed.

"I'm sorry."

"It's okay, Hiei," I assured softly, reaching out to touch him. "Just… tell me what's wrong…"

"The power's reacting against my jagan," he said softly, "Genkai had to remove the guard. Now I can't use it at all."

"Hiei, your jagan is really red too."

"I know." His voice was hoarse.

I pulled him into an embrace. He buried his face against my chest. We just sat there for a moment in the quiet. I could feel the stress he'd taken on.

"I'm sorry, Hiei," I whispered, feeling tears dot my eyes. "It's all my faul-"

"Don't say it. It's not true. There's a reason this happened. I'd do it all again." He ran his hands around and grasped my back.

He kissed the nape of my neck, right at the mating mark, which sent a jolt of heat through my body, then pulled away. Genkai and Yukina returned. Yukina smiled, setting the tea on the table. Hiei gulped down his tea, knowing it was impolite, but doing it nonetheless. He took another and downed it before we even lifted our glasses, then placed the cup on the table.

"How are you feeling, Hiei?" she asked.

Hiei glanced up at her through his bangs. "I… I'm fine."

I sipped at my tea, watching him out of the corner of my eye, eyelids lowered, breath raucous.

"Please be alright," I thought.

(Later, Hiei's POV)

I tied a scarf around my head tightly, eyelids dangerously heavy. The mirror reflected how ghostly I looked. My face was so very pale, making dark crescents stand out below my eyes. I ran a hand through my hair and tried to shake it off. There was no time to be weak and ill-minded. But I was so tired…

The phone rang and I picked it up.

"Hello?" Was that my voice? It sounded so low and sleepy.

"Hiei?" It was Kurama. He sounded surprised.

"Yeah," I half-sighed, leaning on the couch-side table. "What do you want?"

"You sound terrible."

"Thanks, but I'm sure that's not what you wanted."

"I knew you were there. Are you alright?"

"I'm fine."

"Hiei, you sound like you're going to keel over."

"I'm FINE. Now, what do you want?" I was too tired to listen to him and was becoming irritated. "Botan's out grocery shopping."

I'd been tired for three days. No matter how much I slept or ate, my energy was gone. My knees would buckle time to time, but luckily, I sat down a lot of the time so Botan never knew. I yawned.

"Hiei, I just wanted to see why you dropped off the planet for three days. I haven't seen or heard from you and it worried me. I thought something might have happened."

"You sound like a woman, Kurama." My eyelids drooped. "D-don't worry so much."

Kurama paused. "… Something's wrong."

"N-no… nothing." I sat down on the floor.

"Hiei! I'm back! I- Hiei?"

"Here," he handed her the phone and lay flat on the floor, staring at the ceiling.

"Hiei?" she blinked at him, then listened into the receiver. "Hello?"

A brief conversation pursued and halted when Botan said, "Hold on a second, Kurama."

She looked down at me. "Are you okay?"

I blinked slowly. "…Yeah."

She raised an eyebrow, then went back to her conversation.

Suddenly, I felt a bolt go through his jagan. "AGH!"

"Eh?" Botan turned, worried. "What is it?"

I couldn't speak, just rolled over onto my side, grasping my forehead. "Arrghh…"

"Kurama, you better get over here." Click.

"Hiei!" she rushed over and rolled me over. "Hiei! What is it?"

"Me."

We both turned our heads as the window exploded in shards of glass and debris. Botan screamed, clutching to me.

"I'm back," Sasuke said. I could only see his boot through the small space in which the rest was occupied by Botan's form.

Then her weight was lifted from me, her yelp piercing the air with its high pitch. Sasuke pulled Botan up to his level by her hair. I could see glass shards in her arms, leaving small lines of blood.

"LEAVE HER ALONE!" I growled, sending a punch hi way. He caught it with ease, then slammed me into a wall.

Pain shot through my back and I bit back a grunt.

"Mine take her."

I saw Botan being thrown to a woman, apparently Sasuke's lover.

"Hey!" He punched me in the gut then threw me to the ground.

"You're a lot weaker than I thought you were," Sasuke mused. He slammed his fist into my head. I saw stars, then blacked out. "Sweet dreams."

For a moment it seemed, my mind floated in and out of reality, but it was so much longer. Kurama's voice finally floated in to my consciousness.

"Hiei. Hiei! Wake up!"

My eyes opened slightly, but the lights burned and I had to shut them tight. My head pounded and my whole body felt as if it would never again move.

"Hiei, are you alright?"

I didn't care about me!

"Where's… Botan?" I croaked, my voice sounding very far away.

Silence pursued and my heart stopped. Something was alarming about that silence. I opened my eyes, ignoring the shooting bolt of pain that went through my skull and gave Kurama an intense stare.

"Where IS she?"

"Kuwabara and Yusuke are looking for her…" Kurama said, his voice trailing away as he glanced at the shattered window.

But that was all I needed to hear. I stood. "WHAT?" My head spun. Kurama grasped my arm.

"You're in no condition to go out there."

I slapped his arm away. "No! I'm going out there! I…"

_…Promised…_

I couldn't say the last word. I had promised to keep her safe, to protect her… and he took her away. I couldn't even prevent it. She had to protect me! Suddenly, it wasn't just my exhaustion and pain that made my knees weak. The guilt weighed on my shoulders like the weight of the world. I fell against the wall, trying to let the reality sink in.

But it just wouldn't.

I couldn't think anything but _it's not true; it's a dream._ But it was true. It was sobering and horrifying. What was he doing to her? Where was she? Was she okay? Would I ever see her again? I felt myself slide down the wall.

"Hiei?" Kurama said quickly, looking distressed.

I waved my hand. "We need to find her."

"Hiei-"

"WE NEED TO FIND HER!" I yelled, my voice cracking.

I couldn't explain what I was feeling. Never had I been so panicked, so freaked! Everything about me had been lost, no longer that cool-headed, uncaring man. My resolve leaked away and left me feeling icy and shaken. Kurama even appeared worried over me. I caught a glimpse of myself in the broken glass. Most certainly I looked insane.

"We're going to find her, Hiei. We will," Kurama said, his reassurance there but low.

I pushed myself past Kurama and out the door. I could feel the sticky hot blood running down the back of my neck. It didn't matter. I had to find her. I'd die without her. I knew I would.

"Hiei! Don't leave! You're hurt!" Kurama was yelling behind me.

Was that Kurama? His voice seemed so distant, an echo of what I usually heard. Maybe I was the one that was fading away. Fading with her distance. Had I really become so reliant on her?

And the world was heaving itself upward. I made contact with the sidewalk, spread-eagle, staring at the sky. I watched it with glassy eyes. My mind was shutting down. I reached out, hoping to grab onto that oar that she always flew, but alas, there was none. My hand fell.

(A/N: Send your death threats and roll in your graves! I have updated! Sorry it took so long, but the story is slowly reaching its close. Hope you liked this chapter!)


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